OceansAndrew Posted December 19, 2011 Share Posted December 19, 2011 Artist : joe Darwish Song : Ryu Next Generation (RNG) Lyrics… I see them all jumpin' And the place is pumpin' The fight clubs in full effect Will you survive the bloodshed? With an aryuken... Just One blow to the head Knocks you out, you see them bright, little lights all fade, in a daze There's nothing left, but your pride knows you best in the end I feel it in my bones I'm wanting all my fans to know Just why I'm number one With blood over my face I'm always in complete control To survive this next generation I analyze the motives And is it all worth it? It's worth it, when i see you dead The Red straps are on tight Adrenaline is on high I stay lethal with no friends Theres no guns, they say I'm crazy, but I'm strong I can run, faster than ken Don't shut me out for your sins, I'm here to win I feel it in my bones I'm wanting all my fans to know Just why I'm number one With blood over my face I'm always in complete control To survive this next generation I wanted to let go I gave it up for everyone But you know I won't give up With blood over my face I'm always in complete control To survive this next generation Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OceansAndrew Posted December 19, 2011 Author Share Posted December 19, 2011 Is it the twin song to the Ken song?! Mixing starts out pretty solid, with a good vocal take, though the rhythm section wasn't 100% rock solid with the rhythms; maybe like 95%. Once the chorus comes in, it feels like it really clicks. Very cool part there. The little 'yeah' before the second verse seems super dry and staccato; the first time i heard it I thought it was a burp or something. XD Otherwise, this is really great stuff, cool lyrics, and a really nice feel. THe layered vocals added extra interest, and the synths used throughout were tasteful. Diggin this one! Yes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DragonAvenger Posted December 26, 2011 Share Posted December 26, 2011 Can't say I'm feeling this as much as Andrew here. The opening bass riff sounds like it's not quite in time, and when the vocals come in they don't feel very blended with the rest of the soundscape. I'll definitely agree that when the chorus kicks in things feel a lot better, but I'd still say the vocals feel a little too much like they're sitting on top and not fitting in the way they should. Not really feeling the stop transitions personally, the first one feels most awkward to me of the two. The beginning verse needs to have some re-timing takes to clean things up, and possibly have something else going on to fill out the soundscape a little more, and the vocals need to be brought a little more into the mix. I think it's close, but isn't quite where it needs to be yet. I do like the vocal delivery (minus that 'yeah'), and the layered vocals are a nice touch. Lyrics are nice, too. NO (resubmit) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liontamer Posted January 15, 2012 Share Posted January 15, 2012 The mixing needs another pass to tweak some things. I thought the levels were too loud overall and the soundscape sounded a little too compressed, IMO. The lead vocals are definitely mixed too dry during the verses, they're better during the bridges, yet they're kind of buried during the later choruses. Also, during the verses, the bassline's the main instrumentation providing the Ryu theme, but it mixed so low that the source tune's end up too downplayed. Agreed with OA about the "yeah" sounding like a burp. We'll live. For the echo effect at the very end at 3:16, the vocals need to sound wetter and trailing to get that distant, fading effect that would really make it sound sweet. What's here now sounds a little rushed without that attention to detail. It's a minor thing and doesn't affect the vote much. Otherwise, this is an amazing arrangement. Even the little note changeups, which will bug some people (fuck off), are awesome and just add more personalization to the treatment here. Great lyrics, great energy, awesome performances. I agreed with all of DragonAvenger's crits (except the transitions), but this was a clear YES, IMO, that just need a fresh set of ears to take another listen and refine that mixing so everything's sounding its best. Awesomez. YES (conditional) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emunator Posted January 18, 2012 Share Posted January 18, 2012 This track clearly has a great deal of merit, there's no denying the creativity and level of talent involved here. I've listened a lot though, and I'm siding with Deia despite Larry's invocation of the "clear YES" card The positives: the vocal performances are very strong across the board, you've got a very unique voice that works great for this mellower rock style. The lyrics are pretty neat too, though there's a few lines that just feel slightly clunky ("I'm wanting all my fans to know" is one that comes up multiple times and doesn't sound like the timing is quite right.) It's a very minor issue, for the most part I think the performances here are spot-on. The problematic stuff: the mixing, as the other judges have mentioned, is probably the most prominent issue here, and I don't feel like it's necessarily a quick enough fix to be a YES (conditional) vote like Larry decided, and I think that, despite the killer arrangement and performances, it's too much of an issue to warrant a YES either. I think this is a strong track that would really shine and become an OCR favorite if the production quality matched the arrangement. Throwing some reverb on the vocals and rebalancing some of your instruments would be a great start. If this does end up getting NO (resub) vote, here's a few other things to consider. The transitions work in theory, but sometimes I think the stop transitions last a little bit too long. Might not be an issue but it's definitely something worth checking out. I also think you could benefit from a stronger lead synth. Even though it doesn't show up very frequently, the current sample lacks any expression or energy. A more defined, sharp lead that cuts through better, perhaps with portamento or any other effect, would really make those sections a lot more memorable. The current one isn't a dealbreaker but it feels like a very noticeably weak aspect of the remix in its current state. The ending is also mildly awkward, perhaps just throwing an open cymbal crash after the last word of the final verse would give the song more closure. Larry is also right on the money about how to make your delay effect work better as a transition and an ending. Lots of stuff to consider, I really think that with a mixing overhaul this would be a pass in my book but there's lots of other small things that could have a sizeable effect on the mix overall if they were tweaked as well. Loving what you've got but I think this needs another round of edits. NO (resubmit!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
halc Posted January 28, 2012 Share Posted January 28, 2012 I'm on board with the YES's here, I thought this was really well arranged and performed. I'd love to get a cleaner mixdown, which hopefully won't be an issue, but I think I'd be okay with this even if we absolutely couldn't.. I definitely don't see this as a NO though. gonna lay down a conditional since I'm in support of the Oji's request for mixing/balance tweaks. YES(conditional on mixing) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nutritious Posted February 1, 2012 Share Posted February 1, 2012 Man, on the fence here. I didn't feel like this was a clear yes as Larry indicated, but I'm not necessarily in the NO camp here either... So short and quick version: -Right off the bat the mixing felt off to me, as mentioned before. Bring compression down a bit. Vocals down. Kick could use some more oomph body I think as you can only hear the "click" of it really clearly when everything rockin. -Bass sounded a bit loose at the start, but layered with everything else it sounds fine to me. -Vocal performance was the big highlight here. Nice work. -"I can run faster than Ken" is awesome -Ending was weaksauce So, on the first listen, I was leaning toward the no, resub camp. However, upon repeated listens, the mixing issues really didn't come out as such a prominent issue to me as to warrant an outright rejection. I wouldn't mind a version with levels tweaked, not to mention an actual ending . EDIT: given new judging guidelines, revisiting this conditional. Upon a fresh listen, I'm ok with this one going forward, mixing/ending fixes or not. Yes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Palpable Posted February 19, 2012 Share Posted February 19, 2012 I think you guys are mis-using conditional a little here. If you're just asking him to turn down the compression or master volume, sure, but fixes like rebalancing or reverb aren't always that trivial or quick. In this case, "mixing" can encompass a ton of stuff and I think conditional should be used only for easy specifiable fixes; if it doesn't fall under that, it's a YES with a suggestion or NO with a "must fix". We can always still contact the remixer about fixing things we'd like them to fix. Like Justin, the first listen sounded a bit sloppy to me and I was headed for a NO, but on the second listen I turned down the volume and was pretty happy with how it sounded. There's some loss of audio quality because of the compression, but I can live with it. I'll contact him and we can see what he will fix. Edit (3/1): He's sending a new version. YES Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarkeSword Posted February 19, 2012 Share Posted February 19, 2012 In agreement with other Js (including Deia, who despite being a woman and therefore foolish, makes some good points). Composition is great, performance is great–just needs some fixes in terms of production. See other J's crits for details. Would love this on OCR. NO (resub) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zircon Posted February 26, 2012 Share Posted February 26, 2012 ARRANGEMENT / INTERPRETATION [X] Too liberal - not enough connections to the source (too much original writing, source connections not identifiable enough) - main hook not close enough to Ryu PRODUCTION [X] Overcompressed (pumping/no dynamics) - drums/guitar really popping and clicky WHAT I LIKE ABOUT THE TRACK [X] Creative arrangement ideas [X] Good live performances [X] Instrument choices NO Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DragonAvenger Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 NEW VERSION Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emunator Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 SO glad we got a resub on this one This doesn't completely address all my concerns but it does more than enough to push it over the bar. Very nice work, I look forward to seeing this one on the site YES Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DragonAvenger Posted March 19, 2012 Share Posted March 19, 2012 SO glad we got a resub on this one This doesn't completely address all my concerns but it does more than enough to push it over the bar. Very nice work, I look forward to seeing this one on the site YES This. Nice Resub Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Palpable Posted March 23, 2012 Share Posted March 23, 2012 Co-signing that this new version sounds awesome. Glad to get the fixes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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