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OCR04544 - *YES* Chrono Trigger "When the Walls of Time Fell..." *RESUB*


Emunator
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Previous Decision

Attached is a file for this submission to OCRemix. This is a resubmission as it was rejected previously. The required information is written below. If you have any questions or concerns, please let me know. Thank you for the opportunity as always.

Contact Information
Username: HarlemHeat360
UserID:37144
Website: https://www.youtube.com/c/HeatRemasters

Submission Information
Arrangement Game: Chrono Trigger
Name of Arrangement: When the Walls of Time Fell
Song Being Arranged: Corridors of Time

Comments:

My first resubmission haha. It was actually the second piece I had submitted but the first evaluated and I think I took the rejection a bit heavily. But that's the type of person I am. Take it hard initially, then buckle down and get to work. Unfortunately life hit different for a while and I got away from this. But I'm back, with more bass, less clipping, some reworked drums, and a few little additions here and there. I think the blessing in disguise was that through more time and work, I've been able to come closer to my vision than the original. With that said, I'll end this by quoting myself on that vision from my original submission.

""When the walls came tumbling down, we danced until the End of Time"

This song has taken me places mentally--some healthy, some not so. Those places however were worth going and the end product is as you see (or hear lol) with this piece. The development went from this atmospheric piece, to a sort of cry to the universe, and finally somewhat of a...dance. I'm not sure how this all happened but the dramatic development certainly coincided with the dynamic swings in my head. Through all of it though, two concepts always rang true. The walls came tumbling down and time as we knew it ended.

In more concrete terms we see this as the original motif plays in the beginning with energy but mostly untouched. Then the beginning of the end starts as something begins to surge in the bass line, eventually blasting through into the second part of the song. The walls, Zeal, begin to crumble and a dance signaling the end begins. The guitar and the vocals are singing to you, the beat begins to take form, and finally...finally one last push. One more surge of energy and...

the walls come apart and the image of the last of Zeal takes hold. There is something beautiful and amazing about it yet equally sad and unsure. I think as the song ends that really starts to settle in and that image of time beginning to end takes hold."

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top 3 original for me. just iconic.

rich, evocative opening. the drums are both obviously fake and very, very basic - i wouldn't mind the very simple timbres if they did more interesting stuff, but they're just kind of there. there is a lot of volumization issues in this opening section - the guitar that comes in at 0:26 is quite loud although i like what it's saying, for example. the lead vocal part at 0:53 is also very loud in the upper ranges, and feels fake because there's no breaks for a pretty long time (it's a pretty sound though tbh!). 

there's a transition at about 1:24 and it kicks up to a bigger band sound at 1:30. this is a big change and welcome because otherwise it's been very similar to the original up to this point. drums sound better here although they're still playing simple stuff. the electric guitar does some more interesting stuff here and i like especially the addition of more rhythmic elements. i can't really hear a bass instrument here, and whatever pads you have is minimal until 2:24 when the choir comes in.

2:24 brings in a sweeping rendition of the soaring melody line behind some other sfx and percussive elements. the vocal sample you've been using gets a little old here - i've heard this lady sing sustains for essentially 2+ minutes at this point and it's getting old. there's some falling action around 3:13 and it starts to shift towards an ending. there's some piano chords at 3:27 and then it's done, fairly suddenly.

i am really on the fence about this. on one hand, there's a lot of volumization issues where instruments are much louder than others, the drums lack punch and for most of the track are fairly boring/not adding much, the vocal sample (is that vocaloid or a sample pack?) is neat but overused, and the track overall feels like it's missing verve. that's a lot of negative points, and no one of them is a deal-breaker, but i think they add up. on the other hand, though, when the track works, it's really fun! 1:30 sounds great even with the drums feeling pretty blah, and the original's melody is so striking that 2:24 is also a standout moment.

i think this is probably just on the NO side of things for me. i'd love to hear more attention given to balancing the mix alongside more drums.

 

 

NO

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  • prophetik music changed the title to 2022/10/10 - (1N) Chrono Trigger "When the Walls of Time Fell"

Ah, I knew I recognized this, I checked it out in the WIP boards back when (though I didn't participate in the judgment last time). Based on the comments from last time I think I'm slightly to blame for the EQ balance issues since the bass ended up lacking, apparently, so ah whoops, sorry for the over-corrective advice way back when!

I think this is as rich an arrangement as when I heard it before, and while it's wet it doesn't sound overbearing, for the style. Production values ain't bad, though I agree with Prophetik that the drums could've used some more mixing love - they're well done so it'd be nice to be able to hear them! They are also quite dry, compared to the rest of the soundscape.

I don't hear the bass balancing issues that the track apparently had prior, so I think the EQ soundscape works well enough for the site. While I hear the mixing issues that were pointed out above, I don't think that's a deal breaker, and there's plenty of variance in the soundscape to keep thinks like the recurring vocals interesting whenever they're there, so while I hear Prophetik's concerns I think this is plenty good enough to post. Great work!

YES

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  • Gario changed the title to 2022/10/10 - (1Y/1N) Chrono Trigger "When the Walls of Time Fell"

The structure's essentially untouched from the previous version, so it's mostly the mixing that's been tweaked to not have huge volume jumps.

Extremely awkward transition at 1:25 where everything before it cut off instantaneously, which didn't make sense. The mixing also didn't sound right, as the drums have almost no presense. The guitar soloing/noodling still lacked body, but was mixed in a way to mitigate the realism issues.

Shaky choir vox from 2:21-3:09 (2:25-2:26 being the most exposed) that didn't sound right either; sometimes the sustains stuck out or the timing seemed slightly out of step.

I will say the articulations don't sound as jerky this time around, so there's that going for it, though the strings from 2:21 until the end are still exposed. 3:00-3:26 stuck out the most, particularly the longer sustains from 3:16-3:26.

Agreed with prophetik that, despite the various realism and mixing issues, the instrumentation was nice and engaging to listen to; the sequenced guitar's and the drums work the least, but the textures are fine now and there's less volatility with the volume. I still feel that the number of smaller issues is adding up to what's now a NO (borderline) call for me.

Arrangement's come in all shapes and sizes, so the layout of this remains fine. The instrumentation also remains pleasant and engaging. Smoothing out the vox & bowed strings sequencing further would make the execution of this not seem jerky in too many places. It's definitely worthy of support, Harlem, and I'm definitely in favor of not making the perfect the enemy of the good. That said, I'm not quite there, but gradually coming around to it.

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  • Liontamer changed the title to 2022/10/10 - (1Y/2N) Chrono Trigger "When the Walls of Time Fell"
  • 2 weeks later...

I YESed this before, so I figured I would just be listening to this once to rubber-stamp it.  But unfortunately, while bringing up the bass some new issues were introduced.

The strings that Larry mentioned are definitely an issue, which I don't recall being as obvious before.  There are some weird balance issues, especially at the end---starting at 2:22 there are assorted SFX that are way too loud.  And the vox is definitely in uncanny valley territory (though I don't think it crossed the line into being overused).

For me, this is actually more borderline than it was the first time around.  The mechanical violin in the last minute or so in particular is a real turn-off, and I'd be okay seeing this get sent back for a tweak there.  But I'm still leaning on the side of

YES (borderline)

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  • MindWanderer changed the title to 2022/10/10 - (2Y/2N) Chrono Trigger "When the Walls of Time Fell"
  • 3 weeks later...

My previous review called for more presence in the guitar and bass, better balancing on the vocal pad, and smoother fills/transitions. I'd say you largely achieved those, although there's still plenty of improvement that could be done with the mix.

The climax of the song I think is beautiful, around the 2:25 mark - I don't find the vocal pad overused, and I like the interplay with the strings. The drums still lack presence, particularly when they first come in around 1:31, and are definitely the weak point in the track. That said, there's a lot to enjoy here. I like the use of effects, and the panning on them works for me.

I feel inclined to say this one's just over the bar, but in saying that I can still hear plenty of potential for improvement. Lots of small issues, but as the major ones from my previous critique have been addressed, so it's a close

YES

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  • DarkSim changed the title to 2022/10/10 - (3Y/2N) Chrono Trigger "When the Walls of Time Fell"
  • 1 month later...

I gushed extensively over the strengths of this track in the original submission, and all of the elements that made me fall in love initially - the lush chromatic percussion and vocal samples, clever interplay of your original writing with the source material, and the dynamics of the arrangement overall - are still very much present. Your resubmission cleans up a lot of the most notable issues from a technical side, and we're left with a much more polished package. I agree that the drums and guitar tone still don't quite have the synergy with the rest of the soundscape I was hoping for, and I think that this is one of those arrangements you'll come back to years from now and hear ways that you could improve it, but I'm happy to say that the resubmission did more than enough to put it over the bar for me. 

Good luck with the rest of the vote, hope to hear this on the front page soon! 

YES

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  • Emunator changed the title to 2022/10/10 - (4Y/2N) Chrono Trigger "When the Walls of Time Fell"
  • 2 weeks later...

The arrangement is unchanged from last time, so more than 1/3 of the arrangement is intro.  The mixing is clean enough now, although the overall mix is lacking in low bass.  But what is here is emotional and creative.  The drums are mixed way too quietly.  I hope you'll address mixing issues in your next submission, but this one is too lovely not to post.

YES

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  • Liontamer changed the title to OCR04544 - *YES* Chrono Trigger "When the Walls of Time Fell..." *RESUB*
  • Liontamer locked and unpinned this topic
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