This feels completely bottomless. I know I'm on headphones, but I really hear no bass a all. So since there's no bassline, no drums, and you're intentionally being loose with your timing, it sounds disjointed to me.
Notice in Tattered Slippers that he used a pizza bass and some background drones to give it both a bottom and an atmosphere. Others mentioned that is doesn't really evolve or go anywhere, which I also agree with.
Keep working on it.. critically listen to your favorite OCR tracks.