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Hemophiliac

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Everything posted by Hemophiliac

  1. [This is an automatically generated message] I've reviewed your remix and have returned it to Work-in-Progress status, indicating that I think there are some things you still need to work on. After you work on your track and feel that it's ready for submission to OCR, please change the prefix back to Ready for Review and someone will review it again. Good luck!
  2. I'm glad you didn't abandon this and decided to rework it with newer sounds. The challenge is getting the balance to work now. The leads are what the listener is trying to follow, the low end feels too big compared to the leads. Nice beefy drums, however they are over compressed and I'm hearing some pumping as well. Sounds like the kick and the bass might be fighting with each other. Drums may feel like that they have too much reverb, getting some reverb wash from the snare. All of those above factors are contributing to low-end muddiness, see what you can do to clean it up. I do like the call and response of the arrangement during 0:17-0:33, 0:43-0:56, and 1:56-2:09 however the panning on the leads is too wide, I'd recommend to bring them closer to center (Just try that with most everything, not just leads). It doesn't take much panning to have a positive effect on freeing up space. When you get really wide it can be disorienting unless it's very balanced. Also I'm not liking the new synth leads, they do feel basic and much older than the other parts used in the track. IIRC This was an issue the judges had previously. Nice resonant filter sweeps 0:33-0:40 and 0:58-1:13 Noticed something super subtle at 0:34 that may be clipping or some other unintended distortion coming though. Check it out and see if you can see anything there. tl;dr: clean up low end mud, sophisticate the leads, and balance the parts so leads are the focus.
  3. Repeated notes don't have consideration to naming a chord. Having repeated notes just means that the sound of that particular spot will sound more like that one note, in this case the Bb is going to stand out much more then the other notes in the chord. In a vacuum you can call it either. What would really lead it towards having a better answer is the context of the piece and what comes before or after this. Generally you want to name a chord what it's function is supposed to be. Both of these two chord types are subdominants or predominants in function. They want to resolve to a dominant chord. Assuming this is in Bb minor (since you said Bb is the tonic), it's more likely to analyze this as C half diminished functioning as a iiø7 and then wanting to go to a dominant chord after this like F7 (V7) or Abdim7 (viiø7). Generally traditional theory doesn't really look at sixth chords in terms of function except for augmented sixth chords (which are subdominants). Here is info on augmented sixth chords, and may confuse you https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Augmented_sixth_chord Don't worry about naming chords unless it's really important to helping you understand the context of what's going on in the piece. If it sounds good, it doesn't matter what it's chord name or symbol is supposed to be. What I'm saying is don't get hung up on something that's not super important. Hopefully that doesn't confuse and helps understanding some.
  4. Welcome! It's never a bad time to start trying to arrange music. Even just "canoodling" over other tracks is a good way to start expanding on the original.
  5. I think I saw 3 finals turned in yesterday! We're in the home stretch and things are coming together nicely! Getting excited for this one
  6. I really want to talk about how this track makes me feel. That's not something I usually talk about, but this seems to be the appropriate time to do so. Optimism and hopefulness. Wonder and amazement. Eyes open to the possibility of a new world or first-time experience. This is truly an ode to your son as I know you will give him everything possible within this world. I have no attachment to the source or Final Fantasy XIV at all, and the thought of all of this has brought joy and warmth to me today. Stunning, emotive, and breathtaking. Bravo.
  7. [This is an automatically generated message] I've reviewed your remix and have returned it to Work-in-Progress status, indicating that I think there are some things you still need to work on. After you work on your track and feel that it's ready for submission to OCR, please change the prefix back to Ready for Review and someone will review it again. Good luck!
  8. Production is very clean, dig it. Vibe is very enjoyable. I'd look at implementing some mod wheel or modulation of some kind on the synths when they play leads so they don't just stagnate after hitting their trigger. They are fine as is now, it would definitely help them go to the next level. 2:54-3:03 nice original bridge to transition back to the head. 0:55-1:04 and 3:21-3:37 both get very full and are approaching muddy. While they are brief sections, see if there's anything you could do to clean them up some. I'm guessing it's a wash of reverb on the pads that's causing it. Double check that you don't have clipping going on too, I suspect there may be some at 0:55 or it's a compression/limiter artifact. Unfortunately I'm unable to download the audio file from YouTube to check it in DAW. Arrangement is solid, production issues are minor and can be fixed. I'd like to see this with the tiny bit of clean-up and then submitted as it's very close to done IMO, for now I'm placing it back to WIP.
  9. First thing that jumps out to me is that the FM bells got too loud now. I know you changed the bass instrument, but I'm still not quite feeling the movement come through as much as it should. Those moving lines it has do seem that they should be an important focus of the piece (especially the small bends). Watch the compression, during the final section it's feeling close to pumping which doesn't seem to be right for the overall feel of the track.
  10. Losing much of the bass movement at 1:30, that phrase doesn't cut through as well as it should. I think the pad and the bass may be stepping on each other's toes and occupying too much of the same space. That pad is absolutely gorgeous though. The addition of the kick is also adding to the full muddiness in the low end too. The piano that comes in late in the track (4:40-5:20) should definitely come through the mix more. I do like the addition of the piano itself, it helps bring extra energy to that final climatic section. I'm also feeling like there's a lot missing in the higher frequencies in the mix, I know you occasionally have that FM bell synth come in but maybe it's not often enough? I also agree about getting more percussive variation, I know you'll get to it in time. Very lovely so far, can't wait to hear more!
  11. Consider shortening the length of the bass notes (or maybe it's a low pad) so that they aren't playing as much. Similar to how you have it at 1:28 and after. It will help give space to the other parts, and sounds much better. I'm not sure what it is, but the beat isn't gelling with me for some reason and i'm not sure why. Consider adding a hi-hat to it to help fill the space maybe? Changing the lead sound at 0:23 is a good call. Switching up the lead to other instruments is a good way to keep the listener interested.
  12. Would be cool to hear either more modulation on the synths or exaggerate the modulation that's there now, because at times the synths do feel stagnant. Taking 1:30 to get a fuller sound isn't quick and could potentially lose some listeners. Feels normal for the genre to have long builds like that though. The problem is now at 1:55 it's back to a pared back section with less going on. If you're gonna take 1:30 to build up to full, at least give more time in the full section to balance it out. The same goes for the end section (4:31-5:40), feels long and drawn out and doesn't really go anywhere or it's just an incomplete and unwritten section. I dig the idea overall, just needs refinement and work. Definitely workable!
  13. [This is an automatically generated message] I've reviewed your remix and have returned it to Work-in-Progress status, indicating that I think there are some things you still need to work on. After you work on your track and feel that it's ready for submission to OCR, please change the prefix back to Ready for Review and someone will review it again. Good luck!
  14. Evaluation: Don't worry about the vocals sounding robotic. They fit in the genre that you're going for. Interesting source, haven't heard it before; thanks for sharing it! It doesn't feel fully developed yet even though the original is short. It feels like there is still space for more exploration and development with yours coming in at 1:49. Low end does feel muddy as the bass takes up a lot of space, make sure you're applying EQ on it to remove unnecessary frequencies on it and EQing any reverb that may be on the bass as well. After Measure 26, at 0:46 when everything comes back the track gets very full and looks like you really pushed the levels to be as loud as possible. Gotta keep some space in there for all elements to come through and have breathing space. You could achieve this with remixing the levels or through utilizing compression to duck certain elements out of the way. It's during this section that the percussion gets nearly buried completely and can barely make it out. You want to have the mix look more like the first half in the image above, you can see all of the peaks clearly and there's space for all of the elements. Does the vox have a lower harmony? It sounds like there's something maybe a 5th below the melody line, but I can barely make it out. Maybe try looking for another track that sounds similar to what you're going for here and reference it. Using comparison could help you clean up the mix if you really listen critically.
  15. [This is an automatically generated message] I've reviewed your remix and have returned it to Work-in-Progress status, indicating that I think there are some things you still need to work on. After you work on your track and feel that it's ready for submission to OCR, please change the prefix back to Ready for Review and someone will review it again. Good luck!
  16. Evaluation: Very enjoyable track, even if it's quite busy and muddy. Arrangement feels like it's in a good place, and I'm definitely getting a source dominant track. Compositionally, we have distinct beginning, middle, and ending. Good, take us on a journey and tell a story. Production is where I feel another look needs to be taken. The bass is huge and some EQ to sculpt it could help a lot, I'm thinking the high end of the bass synth needs to be reduced some. Might help to do this to create space for all of the other parts going on above it. There's a lot going on above the bass to be causing mud too. Definitely look at cutting frequencies out of other parts as well to make space. I struggle to really hear the arps at times, especially when the guitar is going because they both share a lot of the same space. Also pumping compression will also probably help too. The reason why you feel it lacks "Oomph" as you say is because there's no space in the mix for the parts to breathe. When you can adequately make space with ducking or EQ it will let the other parts come through better and feel stronger just because of contrast. Right now it's a bit of a sound sausage and it's all peaks on the waveform, no valleys (except the intro because of the low cut) TL;DR look at production to find a way to make space in the mix for all of the parts. Nice work so far!
  17. [This is an automatically generated message] I've reviewed your remix and have returned it to Work-in-Progress status, indicating that I think there are some things you still need to work on. After you work on your track and feel that it's ready for submission to OCR, please change the prefix back to Ready for Review and someone will review it again. Good luck!
  18. Welcome to the forums! First post eh!? Evaluation: There's lots of good here. Can't go wrong with how happy Green Greens always makes me feel. Good job adding subtle variations to the arrangement and making it your own in that way. There definitely could be more though. The ones I noticed that I enjoyed: 0:24 the bass and supporting parts, 0:48-0:52 transition is neat (could be more there though), 0:52-1:04 has great alterations in the supporting parts and bass and a few small melodic changes/added countermelody. The 1:04 slide is sick. What you need to work on with this track is the complexity of the synth choices. If you're going to use simple chip-like sounds you need to be doing some crazy stuff with them, add some sophistication to those sounds! The kick drum sounds adequately loud enough, but the hats are buried in the mix. They can definitely come up in volume. I don't have a problem with the drum parts themselves, but the drum sounds themselves feel like they don't fit the genre right...especially the snare. Also at 2:03 this is barely developed, there is absolutely room for more in the arrangement. If I were to make a suggestion on that, you could go to a new section at 1:20 and add more of your own flavors to the track, and change-up the pace a bit. The second half (1:20-end) of the mix does feel much of it has been reused from the first time. If you don't feel that you have more in you for that, at least go for a more proper ending so it doesn't just suddenly end and lose all of it's energy. This is a good start, and there's potential for a lot more!
  19. [This is an automatically generated message] I've reviewed your remix and have returned it to Work-in-Progress status, indicating that I think there are some things you still need to work on. After you work on your track and feel that it's ready for submission to OCR, please change the prefix back to Ready for Review and someone will review it again. Good luck!
  20. First off, thank you for formatting your post in the way that you did, it's very helpful to include the sources and timestamps like that. On to your bullet points, I'd like to talk about those. You're asking yourself the right questions, in the way to help be self-critical. Being self-critical is a very difficult skill to develop. So, asking these questions and thinking in this manner is a good place to start. On the first point, low quality instruments. You are correct, they are very low quality and sound very much like basic MIDI. This is most apparent in the guitars. Guitars are among the most difficult instrument to make sound realistic, especially when starting with basic sounds. The only things I could recommend would be to invest in some quality guitar samples (Impact Soundworks comes to mind on that, IE Shreddage), or search for a guitar player willing to work with you and record the parts. "Too much to my individual tastes". I'm not sure what you mean by this. Do you mean that your arrangement won't be liked by others because it's in your own style? Nonsense! Besides, you should be writing for yourself, and not for others (Unless you're getting paid to do it! :P) Don't worry about what others think, do it because it is fun to you or brings you joy. As far as the percussion, I can barely make it out because it's much quieter then everything else in the mix. If you think that it's repetitive, it likely is. Trust your instincts. Koi-iro Master Spark is only used for 24 of 162 seconds. I don't know how to call that too long, you really bounce from source to source so quickly that the listener is barely orienting themselves to a new section before it changes again. Look for other tracks/remixes/songs that you want your work to sound like, and try to emulate that. Listen to them side-by-side and note the differences, see what you can change to make your work sound more like the other ones. Experiment, and try new things. It is possible to learn and improve, it does take time and practice though. General thoughts on the track itself: 0:36 sounds like it may be a key change, and that change itself is not prepared so it feels sudden when it happens. This is in the source for Koi-iro Master Spark, maybe best not to use that part of the track due to the direct and sudden key change? Throughout the track there's a lot of muddiness and general imbalance of levels between the parts. I can't really make out what the bass is doing, and the drums are buried most of the time. The guitar parts and organ-like sound dominate most of the track. Let them work together to create cohesion and support between all parts. Generally in medleys the represented ideas usually are developed and not just hopped on for brief moments. With how quickly each source is visited in this, I get the impression of disjointedness rather then cohesion. I'd really suggest taking a step back and evaluating what you're going for and do that comparison to other tracks to get the production to a place where it needs to be, then go wild with the arrangement and making medleys.
  21. [This is an automatically generated message] I've reviewed your remix and have set it to Completed status, indicating that I think your remix is ready to be submitted to the Judges Panel. Congratulations! If you feel like you still need to work on your track and want more feedback, you can change the prefix back to Work-in-Progress and we'll go through the review process again. If you decide to submit your track, please change the prefix to Submitted after sending your email. Thank you!
  22. 2:10 reverse sounding effect and 2:19/2:20 (I think it might be a clap) are clipping or are very close to clipping. Now that the bass is boosted it needs some of it's top-end rolled off so it's not creating mud. Aside from that you're done in my book. I'm marking this as completed. Nice work, I hope you are happy with the changes made and are feeling good about it.
  23. [This is an automatically generated message] I've reviewed your remix and have returned it to Work-in-Progress status, indicating that I think there are some things you still need to work on. After you work on your track and feel that it's ready for submission to OCR, please change the prefix back to Ready for Review and someone will review it again. Good luck!
  24. Made sure to grab this one to look at levels in DAW this time. -4.54db is the max this track goes on peak. Definitely room for more volume overall. If you had cut some of the low end with EQ you can put some of it back in because there's a little space (1-2db) that you could probably fit in. While I like the idea of switching the instrument up for the second half change, the trumpet section probably wasn't the right call. It is sounding very unrealistic unfortunately, and that's a difficult thing to make sound good when so exposed as a lead instrument. I suggest keeping it on something with a short attack (like how the steel drums had) or just to different synth lead. Alternatively you could keep a synth brass sound for that lead if you make it obvious to the listener that you're not trying to sound real. Something I didn't notice on the first couple listens with regards to the brass section. Sounds like it's clipping due to limiter in place cutting everything to -4.54db. Again, just minor things to fix-up. Really close to complete.
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