Hemophiliac

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Evaluation: As we discussed on my stream on twitch yesterday I love the atmosphere in this. What's here is very enjoyable. Also as you indicated it is pretty conservative. This could really use some more stuff to fill in the empty sonic space, especially in the middle section 1:28-2:16 (despite that being a trademark of lofi). My suggestion would be additional pads or weird background noises. Things can be sparse, but if they are the sonic space should still be filled. Consider adding embellishments or variation to the melody on the final repeat (2:18-3:06) to add some of your own touches to it. Definitely look forward to seeing if you decide to continue on with this one

[This is an automatically generated message] I've reviewed your remix and have returned it to Work-in-Progress status, indicating that I think there are some things you still need to work on. After you work on your track and feel that it's ready for submission to OCR, please change the prefix back to Ready for Review and someone will review it again. Good luck!

Evaluation: Fantastic improvements everywhere! Great job cleaning up the muddiness of the previous version. Now that you cleaned up the soundscape a bunch 1:43-2:08, or quieter parts feel more barren. What I suggest would be to add a part to these areas or bring up the quiet subtle parts so that the space is filled more. In that section 1:43-2:08, as well as the ending (3:51-end) the synth pad underneath everything is feeling more exposed now and could use some movement. Suggestions for that could be volume swells/automation or filter sweeps. If you want to take the arrangement to the next level I would suggest looking at the repeat (2:59-3:51) and adding variation to the lines to change it up in some way, this will help it feel less like it may have been copied and pasted from the first section. The ending feels a little sudden and some of the sounds feel like they are cut off abruptly to the end. Really pleased with where this is heading and I look forward to hearing where it goes next.

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Evaluation: There is an improvement on the overall arrangement (new segue into original Mario theme), there are some very subtle changes to the breakbeat to help it from feeling too repetitive. Hearing some beat slicing around 1:10, (compared to the first version that was submitted). Not sure there has been a cohesion improvement between the parts in the mix, feels close to the same; but not a deal breaker for me (wasn't detracting too much for me in the first version). 2:50-3:30 the crash cymbal is a bit wild and could be tamed a little or used less (minor adjustments). I'd say the arrangement has likely been improved enough and has enough variation. I'd say tame or use less of that cymbal in the 2:50-3:30 section, and then you could probably throw this back to the Js. Good luck.

As soon as I heard this one, it became an instant classic for me. Absolutely love everything about this, plenty of variation throughout and the style is fantastic. The guitars are clean, the synths are perfect for the genre. Will always jam this when it's sunset and I'm driving on the freeway going home.

@jneen The link for the latest version is not working

[This is an automatically generated message] I've reviewed your remix and have returned it to Work-in-Progress status, indicating that I think there are some things you still need to work on. After you work on your track and feel that it's ready for submission to OCR, please change the prefix back to Ready for Review and someone will review it again. Good luck!

Evaluation: Maybe went a little too far with the extreme vaporwave-bass like you said. I'm clearly hearing both sources being used. The bassline from super metroid and the repetitive vamp from sonic 2, both slowed down quite a bit. It's really cool how you've managed to make them work together. Consider having some variations in your second repeat of the themes in the second half 2:09 and on. With that said, the bass is absolutely huge and takes up a large part of the sonic space. Please tame it and get it to sit in conjunction with the rest of the parts so they work together. It could also use some clarity, some of the lower notes it plays get muddy. Not sure if it's the samples or synth itself but i'm hearing a buzziness on the left side, and it honestly made me think something was wrong with my monitors XD. If that's something you intended, try to make it sound more intentional and less subtle. I do like the pads used in the background, they are very pleasant and sound very vaporwave as intended. The arrangement itself is the strongest part of what's going on here. Work on the production as noted and clean it up/refine it. Cool track, definitely has some potential with some work!

[This is an automatically generated message] I've reviewed your remix and have returned it to Work-in-Progress status, indicating that I think there are some things you still need to work on. After you work on your track and feel that it's ready for submission to OCR, please change the prefix back to Ready for Review and someone will review it again. Good luck!

Evaluation: Highly enjoyable piece you've come up with. I like the dichotomy of the two halves. Arrangement is solid and the source is clear throughout. When the piano-type sound is isolated at the end 4:11-end it feels stilted and could use a touch of humanization. (Might benefit from having it throughout as well.) Good transition 2:17 into the next section. The initial drum hits combined with the return of the bass part at 2:23 may be the cause of the clipping you mentioned in the previous post. Rather then have the master compressor, take a look here and see if there is any way that it could be cleaned up. I'd say clean up that middle section's part 2:17-3:15 for being busy and muddled. Also check on humanization throughout. After that I think you're set. Nice track

[This is an automatically generated message] I've reviewed your remix and have returned it to Work-in-Progress status, indicating that I think there are some things you still need to work on. After you work on your track and feel that it's ready for submission to OCR, please change the prefix back to Ready for Review and someone will review it again. Good luck!

Evaluation: Arrangement, fantastic. Loving it. Arrangement is absolutely ready to go. Love the quieter sections as a contrast to the pumping of the rest of the track. 2:18 I'm noticing a sudden volume reduction doesn't feel as consistent as the other "pumping", don't know if it's compression or something else. I didn't notice it earlier at 0:20, with the same part; but it may be because less parts are playing here. Look into that little dip there and then I would say this is ready to go. Nice work!

Please edit the original post please, and include any relevant information you would like to include.

This is great, so much going on in a short time and very well executed. Great arrangement and excellent production. I feel like there are a couple of references to the Beatles here: 0:00-0:16 is the intro for Because in the arpeggio 2:53-2:57 mellotron is the intro to Strawberry Fields Forever Really cool to bring that influence into the track. Cheers!

You're welcome to come by discord to the #workshop or utilize the workshop forums here to ask any questions you may have or get feedback on things that you are working on. People are always willing to take a listen and provide constructive criticism for improvement.

OMG, I literally had made it to today without getting Whammed. This is the farthest I've survived in the game. So mad and laughing so hard at the same time.

[This is an automatically generated message] I've reviewed your remix and have returned it to Work-in-Progress status, indicating that I think there are some things you still need to work on. After you work on your track and feel that it's ready for submission to OCR, please change the prefix back to Ready for Review and someone will review it again. Good luck!

Evaluation: Wow, lots of cool texture going on. Honestly thought the track was going to keep the empty eerie vibe of the intro the whole way through. 0:54 when the guitar from the source comes in, it quickly gets overwhelmed with other parts around it, very busy. 1:30 feels better when it's guitar/cello together, less chaotic. 2:25 Drums don't feel like they belong. It feels like they are playing a different time signature than the rest of the parts. 3:33 Marimba sounds like the Unsolved Mysteries theme song I don't understand the ending. Is it supposed to be Vincent waking up? Strange and sudden, this doesn't work to me. While I like the textures and atmosphere created, the balance between the parts is off and needs to be blended together. The parts my ear wants to focus on melodically seem to be overshadowed by other parts. The first minute of the track sounds really good to me (more of that please). Definitely some cool ideas, and I would love to see my points addressed.

Welcome, and congratulations on the first post I really like this arrangement, it's very strong and a solid interpretation. Hand percussion throughout the piece is fantastic. 2:54 I was not expecting Song of Storms suddenly, but it works. Production is mostly clean (only did a quick headphone listen). Where you may run into problems is realism with the violin. Attack on some of the notes sound a bit behind. Aside from the violin, this is a strong creative arrangement. Plenty of the original is there with both subtle changes as well as your own take. Should you choose to submit, I suspect this would have a solid chance to pass.

Ask yourself this: "Does it need to have a cadence?" It's not a requirement for a loop to have a cadence. Don't be concerned with including something unless you want to or need to (such as a requirement from a director). Your transition at 0:40 works for me. The thing that I thought was strange was a fade-in at the beginning, doesn't work for me on a boss tune. (Unless that's just that way for WIP purposes).

Cool, thanks for sharing. I still feel the same. There were definite improvements made from the first version, but you can go even further!

[This is an automatically generated message] I've reviewed your remix and have returned it to Work-in-Progress status, indicating that I think there are some things you still need to work on. After you work on your track and feel that it's ready for submission to OCR, please change the prefix back to Ready for Review and someone will review it again. Good luck!

Evaluation: This is a fantastic arrangement, your additions and variations on the original theme are lovely. Also the soundscape is fantastic. I went back and found the judges decision so I could get an idea of what was going on. As I have no context and have not heard that version I will do my best to give feedback on a standalone basis. The drums are mechanical at times as was noted by the judges previously, but not a deal breaker. I personally did not really see lacking low end except for the kick drum. Could use a boost in the low end with EQ or use a different kick sample. I would recommend a general boost on the kick and bass somewhere around the 55-85Hz range to beef this up and fill the spectrum up. How much to boost and how much Q and what frequency i'll leave up to you. It does not take away from the ambient nature of the track to do this, it adds a fullness that strengthens the parts that are above it. After all, a house cannot stand without a strong foundation! When the guitar returns at 3:09 felt loud and sudden. This is REALLY CLOSE and those are two minor nitpicks that should be able to be fixed easily, once you do that I think you're ready to resub. For now i'm going to return it to wip on those two easy fixes (guitar return and bass boost)