Sign in to follow this  
DMaster

Things Video Games Have Taught Us

Recommended Posts

In virtually any world involved with both guns AND swords, swords are always superior.

Always.

Despite common belief, Arthur does not have anything to do with the Excalibur. It always just seems to be... there. It is also always the second strongest sword in existence, if it exists (some random, cliche sword that doesn't seem to have any significance seems to be the strongest, like a 'Crystal Sword' or an 'Ultima Sword' or some shit).

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Rather than aiming and firing from a well concealed spot, the best way to use a sniper rifle is to aim and fire whilst jumping up and down, or moving side to side or back and forth in a wide open area with no cover.

(halo, counter-strike, various FPSs)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Waving the feather of a mythological creature over your body will return you to life...unless your death helps aggravate a severe mental breakdown of the main character. (Final Fantasy VII)

Regardless of how rare and unexpected your presence on a planet/ship is, even of an alien race with which you are at war, there will always be items and computer networks specifically designed to suit your need to power-up and save. (Metroid series)

Mutes make the best heroes. (Metroid series, Legend of Zelda series, Chrono Trigger, etc.)

Objects that appear as if they are not part of the background are subject to the Law of Inexplicable Motion when in close proximity to the main character. (almost every game ever)

Don't be fooled by that cliff with a ten-foot dropoff...despite surviving countless bullet wounds with no medical assistance, a short fall can kill you. (Uncharted: Drake's Fortune)

Teenage girls in pink dresses are very, very deadly. (Phantasy Star)

~.C.S.~

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That no matter how big the threat is that looms over the kingdom/land/world, that cheap fucker the King won't give you more than barely enough to get the shittiest weapons and armor before sending you on your way.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Piaget's Object Permanence is a lie. If you can't see something anymore, it truly falls out of this plane of existence. (Sidescrollers)

I guess we really understand the reality of things better as babies, after all.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
I've already listed this one and other similar statements with a blanket phrase.

And you should write this out as "furniture explodes when shot."

"shooting furniture explodes" sounds like something Metal Gear (NES) taught me:

The state of being asleep is actually an emotion.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

All monsters have deep pockets - deep enough to hold random shit that's only useful to the player, like potions, gold/gil/GP, weapons crafted specifically for the player, etc.

Either pockets, or they stuff them into some orifice on their bodies (which the players diligently search after every single kill they make).

Also, running away is an expensive feat - often costing up to 5% of your wealth. That's like tithing every time you want to avoid a conflict. It's generally a flat tax, too, so you lose no matter what, rich or poor.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Sign in to follow this