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Draconiator

wip PCReMix - Jill of the Jungle Remix (WIP) - 2/18/13 ("I'm Free!" NEW UPDATE FINALLY)

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Update 9: So I was going to add another section after the breakdown that went on for another 40 or so seconds, but I struggled with exactly what to put in there for the longest time, and I tried LOTS of stuff. None of it fit, not even original stuff. So I was looking at it months later, and I decided to completely ditch that whole section and just go with what I have here. I tried Rozovian, but it only ended up stalling me... :(

Anyway, I need to fix up the transition into the last section, because I accidentally deleted some stuff. Wouldn't be me if that didn't happen....oy

The Mix: http://tindeck.com/listen/fqed

Source is here:

NOW WITH A BIT OF SECONDARY SOURCE:

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I gotta say, the source tune wasn't very good IMO. I think you've actually taken it and made it into a better song.

While it is better, it still need work.

The drums can be a little on the repetitive side.

A think there needs to be a little more going on in the song as it doesn't seem to be as full as it feels it should be.

It doesn't quite feel like the song knows where it's going in that it kind of starts, keeps the pace and then just ends at the end.

A little tweaking on the sounds of the instruments used could help as they don't seem to mesh completely well with each other.

But over all, it's pretty good for what you had to work with. Keep it up.

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Hey Draconiator, do put PCReMix on the thread title!

I thought the source was pretty cool, even though it was basically nothing but basslines. It had a nice atmosphere.. the structure was quite meandering (not necessarily all bad, especially for BGM), and the second part (starting at 00:43) was quite messy. But that's enough about the source!

Really nice expansion, with the leads. Good sound, I really like the atmosphere starting with the beginning.. I get this chill-out, feelgood vibe. I really like those quite, tuned percussion -like synths in the background.

It might be good to use more source more explicitly, such as the bass fill at 0:17-0:19 (in the source). You could use that in the lead for instance.

I didn't hear the previous version, but I like the combination of sounds in this one. The drums are a bit bland. There's room for some subtle, cool percussion to spice them up. The bass + bass drum sounds kind of compressed and a bit loud at the start. Later on it seems fine, although it'd perhaps be nice if the other instruments were brought up a bit in comparison. It seems dominated by the bass, although considering the source, that may well be appropriate. (Plus I'm on cheap headphones).

I'm echoing KM*'s sentiment here.. Structure-wise, the piece seems like it wanders a bit towards the end. Up to 1:20 it feels great! The next few measures have a nice jamming variation on the lead, but then the gated synth comes in around 1:29 and, it sounds good, but structurally it's a strange spot to introduce it in my opinion. I'd suggest, at 1:20 just repeating the lead figure (there's enough change with the beat coming in), with perhaps some subtle variation. Then bring in the gated synth and start "improv" on the lead. Just an idea of course.

Overall, I liked the piece, it had a great atmosphere, I liked the overall sound. It was really refreshing, so laid-back and relaxed. It'd be good to bring the source in more and more explicitly, and work on the structure and pacing a bit. And of course, continue the piece! Great start in my opinion!

--Eino

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I agree with Eino, this piece has a really nice vibe to it. It sounds fresh and spacious. The source track was much more stuffy and laid-back.

I have to say I had some difficulties hearing the source tune in the mix, so I'd also suggest to use some of the bass lines as the lead in some parts. I can hear the harmonies are the same, but I'd make the source very explicit at the beginning so there's more room for variation later on.

The cymbal/snare (or whatever it's called) is a little too repetitive for my taste, but it may just be the fact that it's somewhat conspicuous compared to the other instruments.

I'm not an expert on electronic music, but if I were mixing this song I'd make the kick just a little less loud or maybe use some equalizer to push it more to the background of the soundscape.

I can't wait to hear the finished version. You've done a terrific job with such a minimalistic source track!

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I have to say I had some difficulties hearing the source tune in the mix, so I'd also suggest to use some of the bass lines as the lead in some parts. I can hear the harmonies are the same, but I'd make the source very explicit at the beginning so there's more room for variation later on.

Listen carefully - The main melody is being played by both the bass and main synth, supported by the strings in the background. it's liberal, but it's there. The last two notes of each 4-note phrase in the main synth is the source (played by the bass in the source; I think the first two throw people off) and the bass in my track has the same source notes close to that.

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this isnt bad not at all this would really shine if the production was on point theres too much distortion with the drums try to take out the mid of the kick by like 700hrz but use your ears and dont embellish on the EQ. otherwise the arrangement is fairly decent. jus work on the production and expand on the source a lil more and then you'll be set my good man. i hope this helps. Keep me posted.

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I'll most likely be repeating the same thing everyone else has already said, but whatever :P

The source indeed ain't too good in my opinion, but you've turned it into a really nice chill tune, I really like the atmosphere. With some more activity on the arrangement you'd be all set.

  • Drums seriously need more variation to it. 1:20 should bring in a new pattern, like a more active hi-hat sequence for example.
  • Little variations here and there would be a fine addition too.
  • You could take some more of the transitions from the original to spice things up. That way you can quite easily make the song longer too.

Mix-wise, there's some things that catch my ear.

  • The bass is a nicely full sound, but it's too overpowering, the leads get drowned in it. You could possibly fix this with either adjusting your compressions or EQing, although from the sound of it it's more of a compression problem.
  • Also, I think you should bring up the leads a bit more in general.
  • You might want to pan the hi-hat a bit more to the left to take advantage of the stereo space you have.
  • Depending on the overall outcome, I might suggest having a second look on the snare and hi-hat samples, especially on the snare. It works, but a more traditional snare could work even better. Just my two cents.

It's sounding very good, especially compared to the source material, so keep it up!

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Just a quick note or few. In this revision, I have absolutely zero complaints about the structure, it develops well. Lots of fun things happening. I love the feel of the piece.

About the bridge of the source (assuming it's the part that starts at 00:43), it's not well written as a whole, pretty muddy. But the bassline of it is nice. You could use that and write your own harmony and melody over it. The shift upwards in the source you mention isn't bad either.

I'll say it again, more apparent source usage would be nice (in the OCR context), the source only really becomes apparent at 01:05. I still think you could throw that bass fill from 0:18-0:19 in somewhere, such as around 0:47 in the arrangement. I think that'd tie down the (beautiful!) first portion of the mix into the source a little bit more.

I think I was the only one of the commentators who enjoyed the source, and I still think it's cool, can be rearranged in a cool way like you are doing. :) Good going!

--Eino

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Regarding the bridge, I agree with

About the bridge of the source (assuming it's the part that starts at 00:43), it's not well written as a whole, pretty muddy. But the bassline of it is nice. You could use that and write your own harmony and melody over it. The shift upwards in the source you mention isn't bad either.

If you didn't want to do that, though, I'd definitely ditch the bridge and just put original material in.

As to the mix as a whole, I liked the sound choices you made - very interesting, creates a very chill atmosphere. Am I correct in assuming that you're going to add more on to the end?

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mod rev:

Starts off with some nice sounds. Long intro. I keep waiting for some source to come in. Eventually, a subdued take on the lead comes in, and leads into a more obvious use of it. A few iterations of this, and we're already in the outro. I'm surprised 3 minutes go by this fast, as barely anything happened in this mix.

It's got some loud sounds coming in towards the end, watch the levels. Aside from that, you've got a cool sound and a nice groove here to build on.

ARRANGEMENT / INTERPRETATION

- Too liberal - may apply

STRUCTURE

- Too repetitive

- Too short - it feels like it's only started when you begin the outro

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I like how this is progressing. I keep enjoying the piece.

The tuned percussion you've added that comes in about 2/3 is mixed too loud. The sfx around the same spot that you added earlier are still a bit loud, I notice you've turned the volume down but could turn them down a little more.

I've got to agree with Rozo, I except the piece to go on for more, perhaps kicking up a gear. In any case, looking forward to the next update!

--Eino

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I'm glad to see an update! It's fun to listen to this one after a while, it's really enjoyable. It evokes flying, gliding - would be at home in a Pilotwings game really. Only real crit would be that the tuned percussion around the 2/3 mark is still markedly loud. The structure seemed all right to me.

--Eino

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