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A Xanga post that I spit out some time ago. Had a hell of a lot of fun writing it. Yeah, I should write a book someday. It would be filled with things like "+20 enchanted swords of (almost but not quite) excessive sparkliness", and "Holy thrice Blessed mana encrusted earmuffs of complete and total protection from pretty much anything bad." The main character would be a gangly kid named Sedgewick. I would fly in the face of the whole worn out "orphan pig farmer discovers his true heritage and saves the world" thing as well. If you've played enough RPGs, you know exactly what I'm talking about. I find it ironic that time and cliche have made the orphan pig farmer, the proverbial unlikely hero, into the most obvious choice for the job. Give me a room full of brawny barbarians and blonde haired egotistical British men clad in shining steel and scantily clad women who happen to have claymores and one small inconsequential orphan pig farmer who is (bless his soul) only there for the food, and I tell you, I would know what to do. Like the climactic final moments of Indiana Jones' (purportedly) Last Crusade, I swipe away the jewel encrusted chalices of kings, meaningless trinkets, all of them, only to wrap my fingers around the carpenter's goblet. The honor of my sword rests on the shoulders of the orphan pig farmer. "Do you not see your folly?" scream my 'loyal subjects.' "He's the PIG BOY!" "I know." I say, as I lean back into my warm coat of burgundy dyed weasel skins, "And if you'll do me the honor of waiting 80 or so hours for the rest of the game to go by, we can all go outside and celebrate his inevitable victory by watching thousands of Japanese names scroll through the sky. Victory is assured, I tell you. But I warn you as well, it could be as many as 120 hours. It really depends on whether he's a side-quest type of orphan pig farmer or not." And with a low burp, I hunker down into my weasel skins and begin snoring fitfully, as my subjects look on in amazement. And hark! 92 hours, 37 minutes, 11 seconds, 78 levels, untold millions in profits and 7684 swords later, the credits roll, the universe is saved, and the 'orphan' pig farmer returns, having killed his evil father using aid from his mother who happened to be a goddess, riding a very nice horse of destiny, sporting a spiffing suit of spiky armor, and hauling a mammoth blade of justice and truth. Thank goodness we chose the right man to wrench closed the gaping doors of Oblivion. Oh silly me. I forgot the unfortunate beautiful girl he ran across shortly after reaching level 5. You know, the princess that ran away from her dull life at the castle to wander the wilderness looking for adventure. Well, she hit the inn a few miles out and ran out of money, So she's trying to find a Western Union to mooch off dad. Anyways, he found her and they hung out and of course they fell in love but she's the princess and he's the orphan pig boy so it could never work. Que sera sera says she, I love you all the more. That's all fine and dandy says he, but I could never give you the life you desire. Oh but you could says she, you manhunk you. I think if you get to around level 78 and get a horse and some spiky armor and a massive blade of justice and truth and wrench the gates of Oblivion closed and come riding back victorious, we might be able to make it work. So of course he does. The only thing about it that doesn't make any sense is that she's a magician. The princess is always a magician. No arguments. Couldn't she conjure up some clothing? Kinda sketchy, I think. You think I'm joking. Neal Foster is very likely laughing through the tears of hysteria and Eric Overmeyer, if he reads this, is nodding sagely, stroking his chin with one hand as he plays World of WarCraft with the other. Nay, ladies and gentlemen, I seek the higher path. In my story, the gangly kid has parents. Sedgewick knows exactly who his parents are. His father's a blacksmith and his mother's a baker, and he's actually their child, no extramarital strings attached, and he likes it, and there's not a single pig to be found for three fiefdoms around. He's a regular kid. Good lord, this is a masterpiece. I love it.

Oh. Nevermind then.

Unmod's.... gone? Noooooo! Where do I go to waste time now? Unmod.org can never be the same. *sniff*

Yeah, 609 of 'em. Sorted by year I downloaded them, from 2002 'till now. I've downloaded every single mix released since mid 2003. I get to close the 2006 playlist in a few days. Every time I close a year in my OC ReMix folder I have an extra glass of champagne. It's my geeky tradition.

Just a hair to the left of Fort. In Hicks.

I sigged you when you called me things like cocksneeze, anyways. It never would have worked between us, Wingless. I'm too white and nerdy.

Can I just sig everything you've ever written?

Sigged.

No, I suspect that he is using a binary poison. The poison in in the food, but so is the antidote. As long as Paladin-01 keeps eating the food from his neighbor, the poison won't kill him. Stop eating, and he dies. Very clever, and fiendish. Because I'm a.) bored and b.) a total nerd, I feel compelled to point out that since he hasn't gotten sick from the food, the level of antidote must be enough to completely neutralize the poison. Therefore if he stopped eating the food, the result would be precisely dick, to quote Tommy Lee Jones. On another note, does the guy say anything when he brings the food over, or does he just smile like a possum eating shit and then leave? Because It'd be creepy if he did that.

Does anybody have any idea wtf is taking the game rip so long? I know they're a pain, but I wants me more than 6 tracks off the OST.

Let me put it to you this way. I've been backing up my music collection for 6 years, it's just over 20 gigs right now. I figure I've paid about 15 dollars for all of it. Does that answer your question?

Hell yes! Last time I checked, Rockbox was still just for Archos players. I hade a Jukebox back in the day, and losing Rockbox was the only only thing I didn't like about changing over to iPod.

Woah. I did not know that. I thought converters decompressed it and started from the top again. Thanks for the info.

Yeah, question for all you experienced audio people out there. I've been a holdout for MP3 format files forever, because most of what you download is already in that format, and it's the most compatible format. It does not, however, have the best compression anymore. I'm an iPod/iTunes user. Can anyone recommend a format with better compression than MP3 that's compatible with iPod? I prefer to have my entire audio collection in one format for the sake of convenience rather than 15 different types of files, so I'd be mass converting about 20 gigs of stuff. Also, my baseline for audio quality is about what you'd get with 192 kbps MP3. If you can help, thanks.

Feel free to flame me all to hell if you're being consistently bugged about this, but have the fixed bonus tracks been uploaded yet? I tried using the originals in iTunes and they didn't work, obviously. I tried saving them again in Goldwave, and Goldwave froze on me. I downloaded the fixed files from Sendspace and edited the snapping at the beginning out with Adobe Audition, and resaved them. But they won't import into iTunes, as in, I can't even add them to the library. So have any official fixed files been put up yet?

The theory behind this one is good, and it's got a nice groove. But as mentioned, this is really repetitive. That's difficult to solve because the source tune is as well. I'd like to see you try bringing in the male choir part of the original song, not necessarily with the choir, but it really helped break the cycle of the original instead of putting you on a merry-go-round of piano. Great effort, though.

Is that what Mana actually is? A genital disease? That's just creepy.

w00t! Hoodie goodness++! Mine's on the way.

I never really saw the problem with the old download button, because it was a BIG FUCKING ORANGE BUTTON that said download on it. The new one kind of blends in. And Watkinzez: Don't make fun of people just because they're at a lower spiritual plane than you. Cheeky bugger.

Might wanna highlight that download tab. I had to look for it for about 30 seconds.

Thank you, Darangen. I finally managed to resuscitate my computer after 3 weeks of horrifying luddite-ness and this was the first thing that came wafting over my speakers. Friggin' awesome mix. I haven't liked anything from OCR this much in a long time. It does sound a whole lot like closing time, but that's not a bad thing by a long shot. Rawk on, man.

I agree with Bobwillis. Just in case you're a n00b, Revolver, being compared to CotMM is a very good thing. But this stands on its own 2 feet. I love good crunchy industrial, and this does something I particularly like. You maintained a sort of brooding sound through the entire mix, like you were about to bust into some earschplitten chorus at any time. But you didn't. That feeling is exactly what Metroid feels like, if you know where I'm going. Anyways, excellent mix.

Metroid Prime, and the Essence thereof. Those were hard friggin bosses.

Good luck, guys. I'm sure it'll sound great. I'd love to mix Delicate Affection, but it's taken already, and my musical skills are teh suXX0r5. Ah well. Good luck!

This is just an excellent mix all around. We don't get many mixes with this cinematic quality around here, but this is one of them. A quality production indeed.