Nice take on the Song of Storms. I have a few comments, keep in mind that I'm not literate in the technical aspects of music, but I hope my comments help.
1. The kicks are annoying and very distracting, too punchy and harsh. I would choose a different kick sample.
2. The bass that plays during the main melody from 0:34 and 1:44, and again at the end, is too intense and detracts from the lead instruments. Maybe bring up the low end a bit.
I like the direction you're heading in though, I'd say you're off to a good start.