Jump to content

Elder Kirby

  • Posts

  • Joined

  • Last visited

Everything posted by Elder Kirby

  1. I'm really digging this mix! Really got my head bopping. For the strings in the beginning, the longer notes seem fine, but I would tweak the attack on the shorter notes of the main melody, you can hear the automation in the small notes. For the lead guitars after the transition, I'm thinking the problem Light_of_Aether had with them is in the panning. After the transition you have that nice wide soundscape going with the ostinato palm muted guitars but then the lead guitars come in very center-panned, and in context they sound very separate. On the other hand, when the same guitars come in during the heavy distortion section, they sound good because the soundscape is already very filled with other guitar chords and there isn't much room to work with anyway. It might also be in that first note, it seems strange to me. In the transition leading up to the heavily distorted section, I would tweak the velocities on the drums. Right now each kick/hihat hit sounds like it has the same strength, making it sound very mechanic. Also, right after that transition check the volume on that left-panned crash, it seems a bit loud. Anyway, great work, I would love to hear more!
  2. Check the mix on that bell ostinato, I feel like it could use a very slight low pass.
  3. Sounds good, I can definitely hear the chrono trigger influence. I love that counterpoint that comes in at 3:19. One thing that I noticed is that your snare sounds very mechanical and fake. The sample seems ok but every hit has about the same strength. Try to vary the velocity more; think about how you would play it in real life, and try to emulate the little differences in volume like at the beginning of a snare roll vs. at the end of one (usually these are crescendos).
  4. Absolutely awesome stuff! I love the djent and the crazy effects like around 3:45. The cymbals feel a bit buried, but it might just be me. Arrangement-wise, I feel like the mix drags on a bit, and it could use some down time in the middle of the song for some sonic variety. You did it in your Midna's Lament mix with the saxophone section, which I thought worked well.
  5. Nice touch ups! This is coming out very nicely. I can't see the timestamp on tindeck, but in the second section after the first pizzicato section you can hear the rigid automation in the strings, particularly during the faster bits.
  6. This is strange, but I like it! Since you mention getting this posted, I'd say there's too much source material outside of the end with the computer sounds and there's also robo's theme. Maybe have a minimal melody playing in the background for the end? Something like the low synth from 0:19. I'm not really sure.
  7. Nice work, I like this arrangement a lot It does feel a bit short though, I would love to hear more. The reverse crash at 0:40 doesn't really do much, or rather it's all alone or it doesn't lead to more percussion, feels odd. The shakers feel too extremely panned left/right, I would move them very very slightly closer to center.
  8. I loved this theme in the game The section from 1:33 to 2:03 felt very unfocused; it felt like the two flutes and the guitar were fighting among each other for attention melody-wise, especially towards the end. The second flute already complicates things, but you used the same progression for the guitar as you did in the conservative section. What the flutes play end up being starkly different from what the guitar is supposed to be supplementing. You also took out the piano from the previous section, and without it the attention is shifted to the flutes and the guitar. The way you set it up, the guitar is supposed to be the main background element playing the ostinato and tying the piece together. In this section, you give it more of the spotlight with these accented twangs that go against what the flutes are playing. It almost sounds like the guitar is angry at the listener for listening to the flutes, like "Hey! -twang- listen to me!" The twangs work in the first section because it plays on the second downbeat, inbetween snippets of the main melody (in the original melody, the twangs are the high note played by the left hand of the piano). The result is a nice flow where both instruments alternate and have some breathing room. It's a classic example of call and response. In this second section, the flutes are doing whatever they want while the guitar is still following the same formula from the previous section. You even play the accent on the first downbeat a few times at seemingly random. The whole section just feels very messy. But let's look at the whole piece.To start off, you introduce the guitar and quickly head into the source tune, first played by a piano and then by a flute. Next is a nice little residual section where you ease off of the source tune. After a bit of just the guitar playing, suddenly it's the aforementioned cluttered section. Then the coda. For an arrangement that's a little over 2 minutes, it doesn't go anywhere. The dynamics of the tune is the same throughout--the guitar is playing that same ostinato from start to finish, with no interruptions or significant changes. It ends up sounding boring. What's more is the whole arrangement can be boiled down to two main sections. While a slow piece isn't a bad thing, trying to fit it into a 2 minute time slot doesn't sound right. Something like this should have more sections where you explore the source tune and your original melodies some more, with appropriate breaks in the dynamics, over something like 3 or 4 minutes. By comparison, a faster piece would simply fit more content into those 2 minutes. You have your section with the source tune that's handled well and is eased off gently going into the next section. Your non-conservative section begins very suddenly with no indication that there will be a second flute and a new melody--with nothing to let the listener's ears prepare. The section also ends as abruptly as it started, with it going right into the outro. In the end, your arrangement doesn't say anything. There is no overarching statement that you're trying to make musically. The only semblance of a "glue" that ties the two sections together is the guitar, which doesn't even work for the second section. It's just sections A and B. They may as well have been two completely different arrangements if it weren't for the guitar. A solution? I would rework the second section to sound more similar to the first in regards to the instruments used. Maybe bring back the piano, it sounded nice. The double flutes thing definitely doesn't work with the same guitar pattern from section one--either change the flutes or the guitar. Definitely write some more, this is pretty short and without a point. You could make the second section more synergistic with the first, expand on it and maybe even bring a little bit of the source tune back for a reprise or even something different. I can't really comment on the mixing, but the guitar sounds nice. What's your recording setup? Sorry for being harsh and critical, I just hope it was specific enough to where you can understand what went wrong. In the end this is just my opinion and it is your arrangement so do whatever you want. Please work on this some more, I'll be happy to hear more of this!
  9. Wow, great stuff! I see someone likes Polyphia I love the sax and syncopated sections a lot! I'm not sure about this, but I think in the section after 5:49 the guitar with delay playing trills and the lead have some conflicting frequencies. Could just be my headphones though.
  10. I like the vibraphone section! This is one of my favorite source tunes. What sample libraries are you using? Your brass and percussion seem off. When writing parts for different instruments, try to keep in mind how an actual person would play that instrument--particularly in regards to things like breathing patterns, hand motions and the strength of each note as a result of those two. I don't know about starting an orchestration with a synth, and never having that synth play again until the end. In an atmosphere of what's supposed to be real instruments, the lone synth stands out. I'm sure you could make it work, but right now it feels out of place, at least for me. Keep working on this
  11. I love this source tune! Work on humanizing your instruments, especially the velocities.
  12. I've got to say, I love this mix. But what Emunator said about the fake cello is pretty noticeable, even on my first listen. Around 1:10 something feels off, either the velocity or attack or both. Perhaps it's the sample. At the end around 4:10 the soundscape goes from that warm, dreamy xylophone sound to a very piercing piano descendo. I thought it was a bit jarring, maybe lower the velocity on that first piano note there. I love the mixing of the source tunes here, the arrangement is pretty good. Please finish this! I want to hear the finished version
  13. The low end sounds a bit muddy, keep working on it.
  14. I agree with pretty much everything Kanthos said. That high part of the organ is pretty piercing, but I think the dynamic variation and varied bassline could be remedied in one swoop by adding a quiet section shortly when/after your WIP track ends. Some solo bass getting down with some quiet drumming into a gradual reprise of the main theme is something I would personally do, especially after those neat little fills right at the end there. It would also serve to the added benefit of making your mix slightly less faithful to the source, but I digress. I can't really comment on the piano issues people are mentioning. I like it! I can't wait to hear the finished product.
  15. I love what you did with the source material, but everything else feels like a separate track. I would work on tying your original work with the source material better sonically. I'd avoid the hard pan left in the beginning, or at least fade it in. What is your guitar recording setup?
  16. Is the bongo-like instrument just you slapping the body of the guitar? It sounds interesting, haha. You could try double-tracking it. Maybe adding some light bongos on top of that could flesh out the percussion that you're going for some more. I agree with what Trinity said up there as well.
  17. It's pretty short but one thing that's noticeable is that bell/chime thing on every other 3rd downbeat is pretty loud.
  18. As a bass player, it always irks me when a song's bassline is just the same as what the guitar is playing but shifted down an octave . I'd mess with the bass's or guitar's timbre some more to distinguish the two. I like that section where the bass is doing some fills. I'm not sure about the hard pan left in the beginning--it's a bit grating. Have you tried taking a dual-guitar approach? I think it would spice this up. I know you're going for the stoner/doom metal sound but right now, just drums/guitar/bass feels pretty empty. Or maybe some effects? Even in Acid Funeral there are some interesting things going on beyond the base instruments.
  19. I might be wrong, but something about the bass feels weak in the mix. Seems very high frequency and not enough lows. Are you using the bridge or neck pickup? I like using the bridge one if the goal is more of an accompaniment to the other instruments rather than its own thing. Granted, it sounds better in the latter two thirds of the track, so it could just be your right hand technique. Everything else sounds great
  20. The first half strays a bit too close to the original, but I really like what you have going on in the second half melodically, definitely have more of that. That sinister, brooding repetition is nice for capturing the same feel as the original, but I feel you could do more with it in the second half of your track where you have the original melodies. Definitely experiment with it some more!
  21. Great source Your drums sans the kick seem really buried in the mix, especially the cymbals. For a dnb track, you should make sure the drums are nice and crisp. There might be conflicting frequencies, so be sure to check out the EQ. I'd also lower the attack on the kick a little bit. The release feels a bit too high as well. I would redo some of the transition drum fills, the kick-snare patterns don't feel very natural-- 1:13-1:16 and 3:00-3:06 in particular seem to go against the flow of the track in those moments. Lastly, a suggestion: I would add some ghost hits to your snare patterns here and there to spice things up. I get pretty bored of the snare halfway through the track. Arrangement-wise, everything seems fine, but that second "main" section is just a repeat of the first one. Try changing it slightly. Overall it sounds good and the only jarring thing really is the drum mixing--I'm just nitpicking. Keep up the good work!
  22. So it's a WIP, and not finished? I like it, but that bitcrush effect is really out of place. It comes out of nowhere and goes nowhere. I was expecting it to break out in some 8bit tune afterwards, but then it just drops the idea and you have a section that sounds very sonically similar to the first. Either drop the effect or use it to lead into something fitting (and definitely don't repeat it again). Personally, I would add a nice, fat square bass after the effect to bolster the melody and maybe have it slightly bitcrushed to fit with the effect. It starts off strong but that second section leaves something to be desired. This isn't much material though, so it's hard not to nitpick and still write some constructive content.
  23. From around 2:40 to 3:00ish the drums are just a repeat of what they were during 2:15-2:30 and earlier parts, which stood out a bit as boring. A fill or two wouldn't hurt. Or change the pattern slightly, maybe. The tambourine in the first section seems to have this odd, overly-processed delay that stood out to me against the relatively unprocessed percussion in that section. I like what you tried to do with it, but it stands out too much for a background instrument. Maybe play around with the panning. Having it panned center sounds weird to me, at least. Double tracking it is an idea, too. I think you also applied this effect to some of the crashes, but it sounds fine on them--it's just the tambourine that's odd. I really like everything else though; I have no other complaints. The atmosphere is spot on
  24. Looks like it was fun to cover! I like what you guys did with the EWI in particular
  • Create New...