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Let's Play! Metal Gear Solid: Pokeable Ops

The Damned

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Hey all, I'm bored and thought it might be a good way to kill some time, and maybe provide some entertainment for some of you here, whether it's this actually being good, or you getting to watch a horribly self-fail of effort. Either way, right?

First, some intro music, to get you in the mood.



Otacon: How did your insertion go?

Snake: The way it goes every Saturday night with your mom. :<

Otacon: Oh snap! But seriously, did you have any trouble getting in?

Snake: No, the drop point was clear and I managed to rendezvous with the truck on time.

Otacon: Good. Now remember, you have to locate the source of these biological weapons and stop them from leaving the island.

Snake: I got it. This better not turn into another Zanzibar Island fiasco.

Otacon: Don't worry, it won't. There isn't a strong military presence here. The only conflict is between two opposing factions, and they aren't that dangerous in the first place. The biggest concern, though, is the group that's in charge of the island and most likely, the source of the biological weapons.

Snake: I still think I should have brought my own guns for this mission...

Otacon: Sorry, Snake, but the UN has declared this island a wildlife sanctuary. Our deal with the United Nations Security Council prevents us from using conventional weapons there.

Snake: Well, I still don't like it. But I guess I'll just have to make due with what I can scavenge from the locals.

Otacon: ...

Snake: What? What is it?

Otacon: Uh... the locals don't have any weapon either.

Snake: Well, then I'll just get some from those two armies that are fighting each other.

Otacon: Yeeeeah, about them...

Snake: What!?

Otacon: They won't have any guns either. You see, everyone on the island uses the very biological weapons you're here to stop in the first place.

Snake: You have to be *%$#ing kidding me. I'm going up against an island filled with bio-weapons and nothing to defend myself with?

Otacon: Don't worry, we've arranged for a contact to meet you and supply you with your own bio-weapon. After that, you should be able to gather more until you can get to your target.

Snake: Who is this contact? A local?

Otacon: He's the island's leading scientist and an expert on these bio-weapons. His name... is Professor Birch.



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The darkness of war never changes, only where it takes place. Time and time again, mad men seek power of each other, and will twist science and nature to suit their needs. But there are some of us that will stand up to them. Myself and my team, small as we are, are willing to stop these people from destroying themselv-


I've arrived.


I've spent too much time in the back of trucks. Let's see what's out there...


Cozy. A little too cozy.


My first contact is a civilian of the island, code-name MOM. Otacon tells me it stands for "Mission Oversight Main", a deep-infiltration model used by certain agencies to help agents in hostile territory. Hopefully "MOM" will be able to set me up with any intel before finding the scientist I'm supposed to meet.


Time to recon the base-site. It's just a normal house, but I should still make sure of its layout and potential defenses should the mission go tits-up.


Otacon's intel says that a "pokahmon" is a line of animals that have been somehow turned into incredible weapons. They have enhanced strength and durability, as well as various forms of attacks, like eletrical shock and poisonous gases. Some are even supposed to be psychic and can attack the mind itself.

"DAD" stands for "Deep Advanced Detection", which I'm told is another model of agent. His purpose is to keep tabs on his side of the island. Otacon arranged for me to contact him if I need to. His cover is the leader of a local cartel that uses this "pokahmon" weapons, but they don't cause trouble. They're more like informal peacekeepers.


These things scare the hell out of me. They're stronger than any man or animal I've even come across, and Otacon tells me they can mutate and grow more arms, becoming even stronger. The sooner I get off this island, the better.


My room upstairs is spartan, but it doesn't matter. I'm going to be out in the field most of the time, and if things go bad, this will be one of the last places I should hold out in.

Just in case, though... I arranged for "DAD" to send me a special package. No one would suspectan old clock like this. It has a small explosive package in it. Otacon worked out that 12 hours should be enough to get to the target and neutralize the threat.


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Twelve hours, right on the nose. Perfect. It won't be a big bang, but it will be enough to act as a distraction for the locals when I need to make my extraction. Plus, it will be dark then, so I'll have more cover.


She's quick, and quiet. I never even heard her come up the stairs. This is a woman to be watched carefully...


Otacon would love this. he's all freaky for tech and that Japanese stuff.


Standard bed, nothing fancy. I've slept in ditches and trenches with more comfort.


A field manual! But I don't see these buttons on the computer...


Right, now for some tactical planning!


I'm here, in Littleroot. And I need to get to Ever Grande, base of the "Elite Four", the group responsible for these bio-weapons. Looks like I just need to secure a boat and pilot it across a waterway. It might be guarded, but if I can slip by, I can be there in only a few hours. Plenty of time to complete my mission.


Otacon told me they had a highly advanced digital storage system in place in this island. They can actually store and retrieve physical objects via a computer network. MOM set up an account for me to use. Still, only a single medical vial to start me out is a bit cheap...


DAMN IT! Otacon was supposed to send more intel on the mission to me when I arrived. I'm starting to wonder if MOM had anything to do with this...


I'm not going to confront her on this. It's too early in the mission and I don't have time to waste arguing with one of the few contacts I have. I need to get going. The clock's ticking.


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OH SHIT! I've been spotted!


I'm starting to wonder about this op. One of my contacts is suspicious, and the other is making appearances on the islands local television broadcasts. I can only assume that that is part of his cover here.


YES! Time to meet the contact and get my first weapon. I hope it's not one of those freaky arm things. Oh shit, are they the psychic ones? I should try to shield my thoughts when I'm around them.

Mary had a little lamb, little lamb...



Next door, huh? This should be the place.


Yes,I know. Otacon gave me the int- I mean, yes, we have on in my house.


Out in the field? He's a science nerd, not a soldier!


OK, let's meet the contact.


That pause in the middle... Like she was receiving intel on me. Could she be an agent too? It makes sense. Professor Birch is an expert of these creatures. Keeping an eye on him from inside his own home would be a smart move. Marrying the scientist would provide perfect cover fo her.

But the question is... which side is she working for?


She even went to far as to have his child to maintain her cover. This woman is not some fresh meat; she's a hardened agent.



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The professor must be upstairs.


Damn, he's not here! There's only some little girl.


This clock.. Nah, couldn't be.

Excuse me, young la-


That same strange pause... could she also be in on it? It makes sense to have the daughter and the mother working together. I wonder if this Birch knows how tight they have him in their grasp.


She could be a double agent, or both her and her mother are on our side. I'd confirm it, but the place could be bugged, and all of our covers would be blown.


I'm too old for you, girl. War is my mistress, and loneliness is my comrade in arms. Besides, mixing business with pleasure is a good way to get compromised.


She is clearly falling for me. But I can't risk any fraternization on this mission.


I need to find my contact, Professor Birch.


But... no, never mind.


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Where is my contact? He's not at home, and that kid from before said he was usually in his lab or out in the field.

The wife eyes me carefully as I leave. She knows more than she's letting on.


Birch's lab. They may very well make some of these creatures here. If he's to give me my own bio-weapon, this should be the place to do it.




OK, I'm running out of time. That "clock" only has twelve hours on it, and I still need to get to started.


Maybe this child has seen the professor...

Wars always make orphans. Orphans that grow up to become soldiers. Soldiers that kill each other. The dead leave behind their own children, making them orphans. It's a cycle of death the nev-



Sanke: Tightass weeaboo...

Otacon: I heard that.

Any way, this kid might know something about the professors location.


I'm a soldier, not a police officer. It's not my duty to protect people from harm.

Otacon: You know your transmitter is still on, right? And by the way, it is your job to protect people. That's why you're on that island!




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Somebody used Teleport! The thread was moved to Gen Disc!

I guess that's right, though, seeing how it's game-related. My bad. Thank you to whoever moved it!

New part now.


Snake, covert ops agent, arrived on the island of Hoenn, home to Pokémon. Meeting his first contact, MOM, he is given basic supplies and a base of operations. With orders to contact local scientist and Pokémon expert, Professor Birch, Snake has looked everywhere, only to be forced to explore outside the safety of the town...

Our story continues... (wait for it...) NOW!


A man being attacked a vicious guard dog! I have to help him!


But I'm trained in eight different martial arts and can snap a dogs neck with my bare... oh fine.


These grenades aren't grenades at all! They're bio-weapon containment pods! This may be my chance to secure one for myself.

But which to choose?

An aside from the Let's Play: Hello! For those of you that have NEVER PLAYED POKEMON (you sad, pathetic little people), these little bits are for you. I'll briefly explain things about the game as we go along. How the battles work, how the pokémon work, how this and that work... I'll cover it all as best as I can. But if you really want to know something about the games, might I suggest Bulbapedia? It has thousands of articles about the entire Pokémon universe, and can let you delve deeply into the finer aspects of the games as you want.

Right now, we are faced with a decision: these three pokémon are the starters, as in, you start your team with them. The first is a Grass type, called Treecko. It's weak to fire attacks, but beats the crap out of Water pokémon. The second is Torchic, a Fire type. It fests on the smoldering remains of Grass types, but dies easily to Water types. The third is Mudkip, a Water type. It likes to put out Fire types, but Grass types will smack it down with little effort.

See, it makes like a game of Rock-Paper-Scissor, doesn't it In fact, the whole game is based upon a more complex version of it. There are 17 types in all, each one with strengths and weaknesses against each other. Some pokémon get to be two Types at once, like Mudkips later form, which is Water and Ground. This means it is extra-extra weak to Grass attacks.

I'll explain things more as we go on, but you really might want to check out Bulbapedia along the way, it can explain things much better than I can.


OK, I asked someone on the IRC channel last night which to pick, and Treecko won by a landslide of 1 vote out of 1. Then someone said something mean and I went to bed crying. :puppyeyes:


I gotta say, I'm impressed. I didn't even tell it to do anything. It just attacked the dog without hesitation.

I can see now why these creatures can be dangerous...


My contact has been found, but he seems reluctant to talk in the open. I suspect we are being watched... but by who?


You have? But Big Boss is supposed to be... How do you even know about him in the first place? Where are you getting your intel from?


No, I pulled it off with a genetically engineered reptile monster you told me to take. If I had my SOCOM with me,I could have ended it in one shot.


Of course! This entire meeting is a way to explain how a new arrival to the island was given one of the bio-weapons. The professor is rather clever.


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A Steyr is a type of automatic firearm. It's known for it's odd design and look.


You let your daughter out in that minefield of beasts by herself!?


A somewhat subtle request I go save her. This is why I don't like involving civilians in these ops. They tend to wander into trouble that any experienced soldier would see coming from a mile away. But if I don't save her, the professor may deny access to any other useful intel or material I could need.

Alright, Birch... you'll get your daughter back.


An order is an order.

Even if it issued by some non-combat geek in front of a computer on the other side of the world.


Snake: Negative, Otacon, *kchrrrrr* signal is breaking up *sshshhhhhhh*, didn't get that last message *bzzzzzzz* you're mom's a slut *ffttzzzzzzz* shutting down communications. Over.

Otacon: Fuck you, Snake.

Snake: Wouldn't you rather fuck your mother, mother-fucker?

Otacon: That was my step-mother, asshole.

Snake: Still makes her a slut.


I know that. I'm just here to say I'M ON TO YOU.

Best update MOM of my progress...



Holy shit! She knocked me out with no warning! She could have killed me when I was completely at her mercy. I hope to god she's on our side...


Tall grass is also good cover for snipers. They can survey the area without being seen, and the grass, in hot environments, can obscure thermal signals that infra-red cameras would detect.


According to my map, past this town and across a small river is the first stop I need to make on my trek to the target. I hope I can secure transport once I reach the beachline.


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It seems the use of these bio-weapons is so commonplace, someone has put some kind of medical unit in each town to allow for the repair of these creatures. It's free to any of the population that has one of them. But such a network of medical units would be expensive, and they don't charge anything for using them.

So just what is the benefit of offering free medical care? What kind of gain could any one get from such an expensive donation? Could it be an attempt at controlling the population, preventing them from getting too involved in this mess? "Do as we say, or your free hospitals go away"?

This is getting deeper and deeper by the minute.


Another creature! This one doesn't seem to be very strong, and mine, called a Treecko, is more than able to deal with it. The battle also seems to have had some sort of effect on it. It figured out how to use its biological traits to feed off of the opponent. This lets it replenish its health while weakening the foe. A cunning tactic.

Absorb is a Grass type attack. Half of the damage it does to the target pokémon is turned into health points of the pokémon using it. So if Treecko does 20 damage, it gets 10 points added to its HP.


North of here is the path to the river. East of that is the next town, and then to the beach. From there, I need to secure a boat to get across the water to the target. I better hurry, only 11 hours and 30 minutes left on that clock bomb.


Pokéballs, huh? They're some sort of containment pod for the bio-weapons. If I'm to gather more of them for my fight, then I should look into them.

Pokéballs are balls that open and close, and are hollow inside. The exact mechanism isn't known, but once a pokémon is captured inside of one, it somehow shrinks down, or is turned into data, or something, allowing for creatures of any size and weight to be carried around easily. There are several types to be found through the games.


I've managed to acquire another vial of medicine. These ones are meant strictly for the biological weapons, but I should try to find a way to use them for myself. My life may depend upon it.

Let's take a small sample and try it out...


uuuuh, wha.. what happened.

Oh god, my stomach and head and bowels...


The test of the vial's contents was a failure. It seems that I will have to secure human medical supplies for myself.


Even if I could spare one for you, I must warn you not to try it yourself. Whatever it's made from, it's not intended for human use. Don't even get it on your skin. I'm serious. That stuff could make Agent Orange look like a desert topping.


Finally! The river. Crossing this gets my to the next town, and I-

I can't make it over the edge of the water.


Snake: Otacon! There's some sort of... barrier preventing me from crossing the river!

Otacon: I know Snake! The waterways and beaches seem have a special containment field, designed to prevent the bio-weapons from easily moving about. If too many of them were to mix together, the ensuing fighting could damage the island. Whoever put these creatures here must have put this barrier system in place.

Snake: How am I supposed to get to the target if I can't cross the river? Or get across the ocean?

Otacon: That was never the plan, Snake. Didn't you get the encoded briefing on thePC in your room at that base?

Snake: I checked it, but there was nothing there. But I did check the map before I left and memorized the most direct route.

Otacon: That's not goingto work now, Snake. We need to take a detour to another town, and find a way there. I'll try to get some satellite feeds of the island to help you out.

Snake: Ten four. I just hope this doesn't take too long. The clock in my room is ticking down to detonation.

Otacon: The detour is going to take about a day. Did you give yourself 24 hours before it goes off?


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Snake: Ten four. I just hope this doesn't take too long. The clock in my room is ticking down to detonation.

Otacon: The detour is going to take about a day. Did you give yourself 24 hours before it goes off?

(thinking back to earlier in the day)


Snake: About that much, yeah...

Otacon: Good, you're going to need it. You'll have to head back to Oldale and then try going West. I'll get that intel to you as soon as I can. Otacon out.

Alright, double-time now, soldier. Back to town.



The wild monsters aren't very tough, but they can still dish out the hurt. My Steyr is holding its own, though, and seems to have reached some sort of threshold. It's a bit stronger, faster and tougher now. It seems to gain strength with each victory.

I still needed to find the Birch girl, though. The sooner I find her, the sooner I can get back to the mission. Luckily, she was not far from me...




The battle was over fast. Her bio-weapon was supposed to have an edge over mine, but Steyr was a cut above it. During the battle, May slipped me some of the local currency. I'm thinking this is a way for her to help me on the mission, while still maintaining whatever cover story she has.

OK, remember that thing about Rock-Paper-Scissor? And how Treecko is Grass and Torchic is Fire and Fire beats Grass? Well, because of their low levels, Torchic hasn't learned any Fire attacks yet. Combine that with Treecko being three levels higher, and Torchic had no advantage at all. In fact, a high enough level can negate the type advantage in a battle. But it's still a good idea to make useof these strengths and weaknesses, as they make for quicker, cleaner victories.

Money is given to the player if he defeats other characters. But if the player is defeated, then half of his money is taken away. Multiple defeats can wipe out your cash reserve, making it hard to get items for your team. Avoid losing as much as possible!


Now that our little charade is over, it's time to get he back to her father.


Impatient little girl, isn't she? She does have her own critter, so she should be able to hold her own until she gets back to Oldale. I still wish she had waited for me.


Our sparring session has left Steyr a bit ragged. time to see one of these medical units in person.


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I'm not that comfortable with handing my only means of defense over to a stranger, but I have no real choice. Without Steyr in top condition, I could easily find myself outgunned in a battle.


Everything about this place seems legit, but it's still strange how there is no cost to use it. Who can afford such advanced technology and let if be used by anyone here? Perhaps this is part of a monitoring system to track the ones with bio-weapons, to see what kind of growth and development is taking place. Long-term, extensive research in practical battlefield conditions could yield all kinds of data. Otacon might want to see some of this data if I can secure it.


The civilian seems determined to block my way. No matter, because I have to escort the Birch girl back to her father first.

I find it odd how they have the ability to store objects as data, and keep monsters in tiny pods, but he wants to sketch the footprint by hand. Is he afraid to use a digital camera? Could he have made a discovery that he doesn't want others to know about? There are too many questions about this island, and not enough damn answers.


So impatient. Youth is wasted on the young. When I was her age, I was just managing boot camp. After that, I as in the thick of battle with comrades by my side. Alter all these years, I'm starting to feel old. Worn down. Spread thin like jam over a bread ration. Whatever her fate is, I can only hope it's not the same as mine. She's an agent like me, but she still has some innocence in her.


I let May go ahead a bit, and decide to use the money she slipped me earlier. Stocking up on supplies is never a bad idea. I put down almost every...dollar? Rupee? Yen? Whatever this money is on medical vials.


She's quick, I'll give her that. I wonder what kind of training her masters, whoever they are, gave her. She's almost reckless in her run down these slopes. Even I'm having hard time with them, and she just hops over them like a rabbit.

I see her back at the lab with her father. She's hanging on him like a puppy on its new owner. Is it real love for her father, or part of an act to stay in his circle? It's hard to tell with her.


She's been trained in science as well. Her role in his studies could be both to keep him inline and to make sure his findings get to the right people.



Saving the daughter has resulted in some sort of computer device. It may prove useful.



I see... I'm going to "help" the professor too. It gives me reason to travel around the island, like his daughter. If it also has data on these creatures, it could have vital intel on whatever is out there.


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Last one for the night. More tomorrow!


Containment pods! Now I can acquire and keep more bio-weapons for myself.



Good idea. Any changes in your routine could alert whoever is out there. But don't make it too routine. You know, just routine casually.


I spot MOM almost immediately. She's not trying to be subtle. She's either really sure of her self, or she's actually that good.


He has experience with these things!? Has he been here before!?


I honestly have no idea how she got those shoes on me. It's like she's able to stop me from seeing or hearing her, or she can freeze time. Some sort of post-hypnotic suggestion from when she had me unconscious? I'll have to be prepared for it again next time I see her. There is no telling what she could be doing to me when I'm incapacitated like that.


Why would he be joyed? The last time I saw him, he tried to kill me and a bunch of other people. And what is his connection to these monsters?


... I suddenly miss my own mom.

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Snake has met his contact, acquired his own bio-weapon,and after being sent to retrieve Professor Birch's daughter, managed to obtain containment pods, called Pokéballs. Now able to capture his own, Snake is ready to complete his mission. But a drastic turn of events has forced him to detour into unknown territory. Just as this hardened soldier is ready to go, a tender moment with one of his contacts leaves him with feelings of uncertainty.

The location: The island nation of Hoenn

The mission: Stop the bio-weapons from leaving the island

The stake: Planet-wide ecological chaos

Only one man can save the world, and in an ironic twist of fate, he must use the very monsters he has been sent to stop to do it. Can he and his team of genetically-altered creatures stop the Elite Four in time? Can Snake trust the locals that are supposed to be helping him? Will he come across an even greater danger?

Find out next, in Metal Gear Solid: Pokeable Ops!


Even hardened soldiers can get homesick, or miss their family. But you have to push those feelings aside in order to complete your mission. Now that I have containment pods (or pokahballs, as the locals call them), I can begin making my own team. I'd still rather have a pistol or a rifle, even a single grenade. But our hands are tied.


My first step into the grass where these creatures run wild scares a dog into revealing itself. It's the same kind that I found attacking Birch earlier. Could it be the same one?


The fight goes my way. The little pup isn't big enough to stand up to Steyr. My intel on these pods is simple: weaken the target, disable its ability to fight, toss the pod at it. The internal system of the pod will somehow do the rest. I'm not a scientist, so I have no idea what happens to this things when these pods snap shut with them inside. They become strangely loyal and obedient to the one that captures them.

It's almost like brainwashing...


The "pokahdecks" that Birch gave me scans the dog and displays basic info of it. Big teeth, small body. Not unlike some of my old foes. But if I can train it, run it through boot camp, it could be useful.


ocre named this, because he was the only one that answered my request for a name.

I've heard that these creatures possess natural abilities, ones that they will instinctively use without being ordered to. Time to see what this pooch can do.


Cowardice will not be taken lightly! But a good soldier also knows when to retreat... The Colonel taught me that.

Abilities were something that was added to the game in Ruby, Sapphire and Emerald, and have since stayed. All pokémon have at least one. In this case, Run Away makes sure that no matter what the circumstances, the pokémon can escape from fights with wild pokémon. It does not, however, let it escape battles with Trainers. So if you don't want to fight yet another useless pokémon, or are running low on attacks, Run Away can be kind of useful.


Another one. This one is some kind of rodent or something. I don't think it will be very helpful, but it may at least be useful for a diversion in a heated battle.


Another coward. Playing dead isn't a good tactic in war. Most soldiers will shoot a body just to make sure. Luckily for it, we don't have to worry about bullets here.

ocre came up with the name. Complaints go to him. If you would like to suggest names, why not hit up the IRC channel at irc://irc.esper.net/ocremix ? There's fun, games, and maybe even strippers! But not really.


Oldale is just a quick walk away, so I quickly heal up my recruits. Those pods don't even have to be opened to fix them up.

If this technology could be used on humans, every nation on the planet would be scrambling to get their hands on it. An army of loyal soldiers, each one carried around in something no bigger than an orange. An entire regiment could be packed away in a crate, and when injured, simply recalling them back into the pod could sustain them until proper medical treatment is available.

Terrorists could have a field-day with this. Combine it with the PC storage system, and you could ship anyone with anything at any time. I should see about disabling this system, if not destroying it. But it may already be too late.


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