just wanna say that
1. your drums are very generic, you really need to get creative with that beat
2. your bass is in a different key than the rest of the song
3. This sounds pretty much like a midi rip
My suggestions to you:
Make a beat, don't even really think about this song, just work on making a creative beat that doesn't sound like a boring drum loop, spend some time thinking about placement of offbeats, listen to other music with really good beats, try to emulate that (the more complex, the more you learn)
If this is indeed a midi rip, next time try to put down the notes in whatever program you are using by ear, as in, listening to the original and then messing around with the chord progressions and lead, put your self into the song, while trying to stick to the source enough to make it recognizable
It's okay to use midi to study the source and figure out what is going on, and sometimes build off it, especially if you don't have a good ear, but you can't rely on it, because then, well your songs will end up sounding like the source tune, with just updated samples - which is the case with you - except for the fact that things are kind of offkey (and in this case, it doesn't sound better this way)
So yeah, sorry to be harsh, but if you're willing to learn more, I'd suggest trying it this way, and if you didn't use a midi, well then you did a pretty good job by ear, except that you chose things in different keys. It's a song at least, and you can only get better from here.
Keep working on it though! It's the best way to learn!