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The worst games/movies you own


Jax Mandrake
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We're talking worst games here, not best.

See, Nate knows what he's talking about :P Link's Awakening is a great handheld Zelda and we know it!

Let's see - while it's more likely for me to have a terrible record, I can at least state a few things:

- Spyro: Enter the Dragonfly (GameCube) / Spyro: Shadow Legacy (DS) - I used to have the PS2 version of the former, but the GameCube version was just a heck of a LOT more playable and a more go-to if I needed to get any vid feeds from it. Still didn't help the quality of the game. Shadow Legacy, on the other hand, is severely broken and I was lucky to complete it twice, but one look at that and you'd see no wonder why the original arc was completely abandoned.

- Animaniacs (Game Boy) - Why I played the hell out of this when I was a kid just baffles me... o.o

- Guitar Hero Van Halen (Wii) - Just bought for the sake of filling up my GH game collection. Sure, if you want challenging as hell guitar charts, it's all there; but even then GH Metallica was FAR better if you want something paying a thorough homage to the band being headlined.

- Sonic the Hedgehog (2006) [PS3] - Bought to catch up on all the major Sonic game releases I missed after playing through Generations. I survived a full playthrough of this though xD

- Frogger (PS1) - Probably not giving it as much credit as it deserves given how Frogger games after this have gone, but all I know is that I went shopping for Rage Racer and came back with this under Mom's suggestion, and it just came off as a bland facelift. Like, what?

Think that's what's around in my room for the time being. I rarely get films on DVD though as opposed to TV show discs, and even if I do it's just for enjoying the film in the first place. That said, you know something's weird if I consider the worst film in my collection to be the Rocky Horror Picture Show, but I love playing it close to Halloween anyway xD

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So my college friends and I have been doing this thing we call Terrible Movie Tuesday for about 3 years now, so we've seen a few awful ones. For some reason, I'm a fan of the animals-attacking-people "horror" films:

2-Headed Shark Attack

Birdemic Shock and Terror (despite the first 40 minutes containing no shock and very little terror)

Mega Shark vs Crocosaurus

Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus

Sharktopus

Shark Attack 3

Snakes on a Plane

As far as worst games is concerned... I dunno. Super James Pond for SNES is really cheesy, but, somehow, the gameplay works.

Edit: Oooh! Forgot about Mega Piranha.

And also Thankskilling.

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So my college friends and I have been doing this thing we call Terrible Movie Tuesday for about 3 years now, so we've seen a few awful ones. For some reason, I'm a fan of the animals-attacking-people "horror" films:

2-Headed Shark Attack

Birdemic Shock and Terror (despite the first 40 minutes containing no shock and very little terror)

Mega Shark vs Crocosaurus

Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus

Sharktopus

Shark Attack 3

Snakes on a Plane

As far as worst games is concerned... I dunno. Super James Pond for SNES is really cheesy, but, somehow, the gameplay works.

Edit: Oooh! Forgot about Mega Piranha.

And also Thankskilling.

Birdemic is the greatest movie ever.

I swear, it is so unbelievably awful that it is amazing.

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I own a game that is sheer awfulness. It has not been reviewed by anyone (well known, at least), which makes it kind of special for me. I can sit people down, have them play it, and they'll have no idea what to expect.

"Awesome Possum Kicks Doctor Machino's Butt" is a god-forsaken piece of shit made by TENGEN. It's a blatant copy of the Sonic games for one thing, but it's executed verrrrrrrry badly. It has tons and tons of terrible digitalized speech, most of which are annoying and meaningless one-liners, which your character says every time you do ANYTHING. On top of all of that, it's an "environmental" game, so every second tries to shove recycling lingo in your face. It also makes you take a quiz every level, but the answers are often exagerated.

It's hard to describe how bad this game is, but it's not as bad as some other games. It's a bit worse than the Bubsy games, imo.

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Shadow Hearts: Covenant. Passable gameplay and graphics; everything else is shit.

Worse than Xenosaga 2.

What. Covenant was the best one in the series. I mean, Yuri Hyuga is one of the best game protagonists ever, and the rest of the cast were amusing as hell. The music was pretty awesome too. What about it did you hate so much?

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Oh yeah, I also regret owning this

Marvel_Vs_Capcom_3_box_artwork.jpg

First Capcom fighter that made me want to burn the disc with a blowtorch and mail it to the developers.

That's funny. All capcom fighters make me want to do that.

Z direction input my ass! Charging attacks are even worse.

Except for Star Gladiator/Plasma Sword, wish they kept that one up.

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What. Covenant was the best one in the series. I mean, Yuri Hyuga is one of the best game protagonists ever, and the rest of the cast were amusing as hell. The music was pretty awesome too. What about it did you hate so much?

The first SH was good. Decent plot, interesting characters and character interactions, and good music. It also did alright with its darker tone. Nothing remarkable, but it made for a decent game.

SH2 had none of that. The writing was banal, the characters were intolerable, the voice acting was atrocious, and some of the music was bad enough to mandate muting (though, admittedly, most of it was ok). Any real character interaction played second fiddle to an awkward, unfunny mix of standup and slapstick, which meant that the supposed comedy was not only bad in itself but that it also brought down the entire game, wholly missing the point of comic relief. This was particularly ill-suited in a sequel to a relatively dark game, making Covenant hardly worthy of its series' name.

You are dead to me.

B-but... you never let me know that I was alive to you! All these unrequited feelings!

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Oh yeah, I also regret owning this

Marvel_Vs_Capcom_3_box_artwork.jpg

First Capcom fighter that made me want to burn the disc with a blowtorch and mail it to the developers.

The Ultimate version was better, but still gabbage compared to I and II. They must have gotten high, wrote down some really unsuitable character names on scrap paper, threw them in a drawing hat, did more drugs, and gave the characters the worst possible moves.

They took a nap in the studio and rose awake with the game finished. Effort and creativity aren't disappointing enough. Gotta hit the fans in the crotch.

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