OCR04395 - *YES* Valkyrie Profile "Nibelung Valesti"

[Rexy]

If the track passes, we'll need to get in touch with Jean-Marc for both a new title and the removal of the in-game voice clips.
-Rexy

Remixer name : jmabate
Real name : abate jean marc
Email : 
website : https://www.youtube.com/user/jmabate
userid : 35644

Name of game(s) arranged : Valkyrie Profile
Name of arrangement : Take a Flight cover
Name of individual song(s) arranged : Take a Flight
Composer :  Motoi Sakuraba
System : Sony Playstation 
Original : 

Guest : Psamathes - Vocals

Edited December 1, 2022 by Liontamer
revision production and unique track title given

[Jivemaster]

Choir intro leading into the guitar worked well. Guitar tone is quite nice. Drums are very muffled, with only mild pops being audible. The bass feels mostly sub. This is a shame as the guitar performance is quite good, with a lot of licks throughout. Many changes occur across the arrangement. The break at the mid-point was well placed, but short lived, jumping back in for a solo of sorts. There are a couple weird notes during that portion, with odd notes occurring again a few times when the main chorus part of the theme is played. Not sure of the cause, either there is a clash somewhere underneath or something is slightly flat. Along with the muffled mixing, thing's aren't quite where I'd want them to be. I'd like to see a revisit to tidy some of these issues up.

NO

[Rexy]

Your arrangement skills have been shaping up nicely since the last time I assessed any of your works!  In all fairness, the source is only 80 seconds long, leaving room for interpretation aplenty.

Indeed, it starts with a conservative take.  Then at 1:01, you suddenly threw in an aggressive variation on the source's more somber E section, letting the loop then resume 15 seconds later.  Following its conclusion at 1:39, it returned to an exploration of the C section along with a rad solo that trails between improvized writing and melody exploration.  The E section's aggressive take returned at 2:04, with that same melody getting used for the big finisher and layered vocal finish.  Indeed, the complexity is getting up there with your guitar skills - so I consider it a fun ride.

Yet, the arrangement isn't without its faults.  Firstly, the 2:04 section is identical to that at 1:01, so at least some subtle variation in rhythm guitar performance or drum writing could've helped.  Thankfully, you did just that at 2:18 with the faster strums and the double kick pedal use, so that makes the blip feel minor in comparison.  However, for all E section applications in the key of A minor, the first note at the fourth bar's start doesn't mesh with your modified chord structure well.  Said pitch is an F#, just like in the section's scale in the source material, but it badly clashes with your chosen chord of F major.  Reworking either your lead or backing can fix this, and I'm afraid you may need to ask Psamathes again to re-record the appropriate harmony for the ending as well.

The recording quality of the guitars and vocals are top-notch, and the guitar tone itself is as brutal as I'd like to see in an arrangement like this - good stuff.  The mixdown is okay, but it does feel very bass-heavy - as if there are too many sub frequencies going on.  It's fair to roll a pinch of that off the bass guitar so the rest of the mix can breathe more.  I had to think about the drum kit, though - I'm able to hear the parts, but the snare, in particular, isn't cutting through very well, with only snaps being audible.  See if you can find where the fundamental tone is for your snare in terms of EQ and make some instrument cuts to let it pack more of a punch.

I like the track for the most part, but those sour notes need to get addressed first and foremost before posting.  While not as problematic in comparison, the stuffy mixing is also worth checking out, especially when getting the best out of your snare and taming your bass.  Jean-Marc, I hope you still have your project file because this is an idea I'd like to get behind if you can refine it.

NO (resubmit)

[prophetik music]

oh, what a fun intro. guitars sound real fun on the intro as well. i agree with jive that the drums are pretty punchy/overcompressed, but i can hear what they're doing without too much trouble. i do agree that the bass parts are pretty much sub only and you're not getting much attack throughout, and the result is that it's a bit muddy in the full band parts. vox parts sound great. if i'm pointing out anything it's that the vox parts at the very end could use some tuning from the center of the note - the lower parts sound slightly flat compared to her singing up higher (honestly beautiful tone on those high parts, it's so difficult to keep head voice clear like that while trying to keep it straight-tone).

the 'wrong note' that is being called out isn't wrong at all, it's just later in the original track. the major 6 that sounds 'wrong' (comes up at 1:07 as well as other places) is the section from 0:57-1:04 in the source track. the song fits better into a dorian than a minor, given that there's a ton of g naturals and a heavy emphasis on b throughout, plus the E major chords used on cadences sound real borrowed next to the G major and e minors used elsewhere. anyways, lots of nerd talk to say that an F# in this song is in keeping with the original and it's not wrong. after several listen-throughs i'm not hearing any crunchy notes.

this is a great track. there's definitely some mastering tweaks that could make it better but i think this is well-handled and approachable. excellent work.

 

 

YES

[DragonAvenger]

This one is close for me. Arrangement is solid, and the guitar playing really solidifies the track. The vocals are pretty good as well, minus what prophetic has mentioned about the end intonation. I'm not as bothered by the bass as the others, and I think the drums do squeak by as well. The "wrong note right note" debate to me comes down to the fact that first impression is that it is not fitting into the track well.

Looking at all of the aspects, I can honestly see this going either way. My impression is that this just gets by, but I would not be disappointed to get some fixes in here if it came down to a resub.

YES (borderline)

[Liontamer]

The arrangement's straightforward but personalized well, so that part isn't in question, and I particularly dug the energy of Jean Marc's guitar work. Psamathes was strong per her usual, and I actually didn't have any problem with her performance. I hear the various odd notes others brought up (e.g. 1:06, 2:09, 2:22).

Though I can see where the YESs are coming from on the production being good enough, I thought the mixing wasn't great and needs another pass. Percussion brought in from :19-:26 was too sizzly. I agreed with Jivemaster and Rexy's criticisms on the track being too heavy with the lows; the track felt pretty cluttered. I actually had more of a problem with that than the odd notes. If the mixing's improved, this is good to go. Good work so far, Jean Marc!

NO (resubmit)

EDIT (12/8/22): New version's in tow with improved mixing. YES, please!

Edited December 9, 2022 by Liontamer
changed vote to YES after new version

[Emunator]

I found this to be comfortably above the bar. The guitar performance is incredibly tight, and Psamathes adds a ton of character to the sound palette. As always, I love your ambition with changing up rhythm at a moment's notice while never feeling like you're just tacking disparate concepts together without any glue between them. The mixing felt serviceable and never obscured my ability to hear anything important, even if the frequency balance felt imperfect. 

YES

[djpretzel]

This opened & ended solid for me - I especially like the combo of psamathes' vox + electric guitar on the last bits. I hate to "help out" with voting by contributing to gridlock, but (while I can hear some room for improvement) I felt that this was enjoyable and production was solid enough, for me; I basically concur with @Emunator, thus we have a third:

YES

[MindWanderer]

I feel like this is more conservative than my peers are giving it credit for: the first half is pretty close to a cover, then there's basically no transition into the second half, which has some original takes but also retreads a lot of the same material.  I'm willing to call it over the bar in regards to interpretation, but not by a comfortable margin.

Mixing, on the other hand, sounded fine to me.  I tested with multiple headphones, and the lows seemed clear enough on even my bassiest ones.  There is a lot of nuance to the rhythm guitar that's lost in the mix, though; a pass that makes that line in particular more audible would be welcome.  Not essential, though.

I do hear those dissonant moments.  I'm not as well-educated as proph, but there are way more parts in this remix than there were in the source for that section.  In the original it's pretty much just the lead vox, the xylophone, and the pad.  I definitely hear something clashing with the accidental that isn't in the original.  I think it's the bass, but it's so busy it's hard to tell exactly.

Overall I don't hear more than minor issues here.  I'm in agreement with Emu and djp:

YES

[DarkSim]

Wow, this is quite a package for a 3-minute track!

We begin with some faded-in vocals and some arpeggiated guitar chords. There’s something odd about the panning of the guitar that tripped me up on listening - it shifts abruptly mid-note to be more central at 0:14 and I’m not sure why! It would have been fine to leave it panned more to the right, or slowly shift it into the middle. I also felt you could have milked the intro a bit more and let it build more dramatically before bringing the ENERGY, but I don’t blame you for wanting to get stuck in. When it really kicks off at 0:36 I’m enjoying how the guitar works with the vocal backing, however things do get very busy. The guitar sounds great, yet the mix feels quite claustrophobic at times. This is probably due to the large amount of sub-bass going on in both kick and bass. The break halfway through the track is a welcome relief - albeit brief!

That kick sounds like it’s got a bit too much low-end in the sample’s transient tail. I say this because it sounds really boomy during the 1/16th sections, but at 1/32 intervals (1:22) it sounds better. If it were reverb causing the issue, you’d hear it getting worse the faster it was played, but as 1/32 sounds cleaner, I’d say it’s the transient. Might be worth reshaping that in future if you’re going to use the same kit, and shortening the tail on the kick to clean it up a bit.

The percussion is sequenced well, although I do agree with Larry that the open hat is too exposed in the mix. Sounds like it’s panned too far left with not enough reverb on it so it feels like I can almost see it in my left eye. Would be nicer if it sat further back in the mix so as not to draw too much attention to itself. Bev’s on point about the snare too - it lacked some punch, but again not a dealbreaker.

Onto the outro and the vocals are beautiful - again I find myself wanting another few bars out of the calmer sections of the piece just to show off these elements on their own, but alas, it’s all over.

Overall I found it a largely enjoyable piece. Some excellent performances carry it, papering over some minor production flaws. The mix was on the edge of being uncomfortably busy, but just scrapes through. Other issues I had were down to personal taste, so ignoring those, this one makes the cut in my book.

YES (Conditional on sample removal)

Edit: Gonna change this to conditional after finding the sample used in the track. As it's an Enix game, Square Enix don't permit samples in remixes, as per judging guidelines.

Edited January 30, 2022 by DarkSim
Sample source

[XPRTNovice]

Oh man I LOVE the voices at the beginning, and the guitars leading up to that first big drop. Fantastic opening! 

Right away though at :23-:29, there's something happening (I think it is in the guitars, but I can't be clear because of the nature of the critique) that is muddying up the mix. It could be the way the bass is interacting with the guitar, but I hear some major mud around 300hz that goes away around :29. This makes me think that it's the way the bass is interacting with either the kick or the guitar, both of which drop out there. That problem does not persist at :35 when we come back in, so just take a look at that specific section. Five seconds of EQ automation will fix that right away once you isolate what is causing the problem. I hear it again in the :45 second realm. As I get more and more through the piece, I am convinced that it's the bass that's the problem, and you just need to carve a little space out of it EQ-wise. It becomes persistent around 1:05. This is my single biggest, and really only beef with production, but it's a big one and I think needs to be addressed before it goes to the site. But it really is a very, very quick fix. 

Two guitar mixing suggestions - the solo at 1:45 is great - bring it out! It really needs to come out and sparkle because it's REALLY good, and also the harmonized arpeggios that come right before the sample THAT THOU SHALT REMOVE at 2:03 are suuuuper good. That stuff should be front and center. 

The vocals throughout the track are great, honestly, and the way you use them to end the piece is fantastic. There's ONE note in the harmonization at 2:44 that needs some tuning, and the end could have been tighter. Normally I wouldn't critique it because it's live, and human, but the rest of the song is so very tight that it sounds out of place. 

Arrangement...I love it. I really do. You capture the feeling of the piece, do different things with it. Great job. This low-end mixing issue is the only reason I am NOing the track and you should definitely take another quick pass at it and resubmit, because after that for me it's an easy, easy pass. 

NO (resubmit)

 

[Chimpazilla]

Great performances here, and super arrangement.  In-game vocal clips must be removed.  I agree with my peers that the mixing is less than ideal, a bit on the muddy/overcrowded side, but I don't find any of it to be dealbreaker. Take out the game audio and let's get this one posted.  

YES (conditional on removal of game audio)

[prophetik music]

i emailed jean marc asking for an updated version without audio clips and a better title.