I like the texture of the piece; the strings, guitar, and hand percussion work well together. They're a bit punchy though, so this mix feels like it's plodding a bit. Strings aren't too creative; lots of sustained stuff, but I'm guilty of that too usually, and it works here.
However, I think this mix is way too long. You could cut out a lot of the intro and condense the rest of the piece to make something more effective. It takes too long to get to the actual melody; more than halfway through the piece. The preceding material just feels like timewaster material, going through the chords again and again.
Borderline NO