Review a game in three sentences

[LuketheXjesse]

Tremendous learning curve.

No kidding.

[Ferret]

World of Goo:

It's an interesting concept to be sure and it garnered a lot of interest at first but it's starting to look pretty boring. The premise behind it is to use a limited number of goo balls to build a structure to reach a pipe to suck up a certain number of goo balls which gets pretty repetitive after awhile. They try to change things up a bit with balloons and different kinds of goo and stuff; while the music is nice and the animation/graphics will probably run on a 486 (not that I would try) I'm beginning to doubt that it was worth the money I spent on it.

Final Verdict: Fairly interesting at the start but the repetition sets in way too quickly. If you want a good puzzle game, go play Lemmings. 3/5

[Zipp]

Dance Dance Revolution

She's dressed in yellow, she says "Hello,

Come sit next to me you fine fellow."

You run over there without a second to loose.

And what comes next, hey bust a move.

I applaud you.

[Thin Crust]

Brave Fencer Musashi

A story where a reincarnated hero is charged with the revival of the great legendary sword of luminescence called Lumina that must first be powered up by finding the 5ive scrolls, each of which being guarded by a crest guardian that is located only abstractly by clues from places that you would never look for in the first place, while all the while unlocking new and interesting powers after the absorption of the 5ive scrolls that are the only way to find the new areas that are offered upon completion of these previous tasks making the game more linear than what it first seems seeing as how you need to look through absolutely every nook and cranny to find out how to get to your next destination that proves to be more and more intangible as the game goes on including cryptic messages, giant ant hills that make their homes out of entire binchotite mines, and ice castles from other dimensions that can only be reached by following a certain path through the meandering forest, all of which build up the suspense of finding out that the guy helping you throughout the game is actually the leader of the bad guys who gets betrayed by his subordinate upon revealing his royal lineage near the last scene where it is revealed that all the trouble you went through of trying to unlock the sword’s power only served to fuel and release the wizard of darkness that was sealed within the sword resulting in an epic battle where you force the wizard’s tiny a** back into the sword while somehow subduing the enemy nation in the process that is unexplained in the least bit seeing as only the fuehrer is killed upon the revival of the wizard of darkness and his subordinates, all of which have no objection to his plans still live.

I guess I only used one sentence.

Oh, and there’s minkus.

[Nabeel Ansari]

I guess I only used one sentence.

But it's a run on sentence.

[q-pa]

Brave Fencer Mushai

...

I guess I only used one sentence.

Oh, and there’s minkus.

Sorry, I'm not reading that.

Anyway...

Battletoads: A Haiku

Play: diverse & fun

Graphics: best on NES

Difficulty: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA- AAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

The Legend of Zelda: in 3 sentences

Those creatures of Ganon are pretty bad!

Octorocks, Tektikes and Leevers too!

But with your help, our hero pulls through.

Sorry, somebody had to do it

[Ferret]

Super Smash Brothers: Melee:

I'll get right to the point: This game almost singlehandedly defined what people expect out of a character-driven crossover brawler. It's fun, it's challenging, and it uses plenty of classic Nintendo names and a few that people might not have heard of but will now that they've played it. Too much bitching about tiers and too much Final Destination No Items matches, however.

5/5

[Thin Crust]

Super Smash Brothers: Melee:

I'll get right to the point: This game almost singlehandedly defined what people expect out of a character-driven crossover brawler. It's fun, it's challenging, and it uses plenty of classic Nintendo names and a few that people might not have heard of but will now that they've played it. Too much bitching about tiers and too much Final Destination No Items matches, however.

5/5

Screw that. The original was better. I had a lot of fun playing the first, but I hated the second. And I also don't care for Nintendo either.

[FR]

I'm finding myself agreeing with thin crust

let the nightmare stop

please

[Ferret]

Melee was fine, but they had to go for a third, and that's what killed it.

Also fuck trying to find people to play with :/

[Poke'G]

Harvest Moon

The game is quite bland.

Repetition becomes old.

Why can't I stop yet?

Godzilla 2: War of the Monsters

Like Famicom Wars.

But you fight giant monsters.

Don't use the A-Bomb.

Streets of Rage (all)

Blaring loud techno.

Amazing moves and levels.

Kicks Final Fight's ass.

[Dervish]

Diablo II: Lord of Destruction haiku reviews, which can be read individually or in sequence! Also, if read in sequence, you can loop back and start at the beginning again with no interruption!

(1)

Spend twenty dollars.

Try to find legit items;

frustrated, you'll bot.

(2)

Hdins everywhere,

duped high runes make every

character broken.

(3)

"At least B-Net's free,"

you'll think, as you fail to do

something productive.

(4)

Click on some monsters.

Wait for one-point-one-three patch.

Click the same monsters.

(5)

You will keep playing,

secretly wishing that Bliz will

ban you for botting.

(6)

You've been gone for months,

years; then: "What's a good way to

kill an afternoon...?"

[Gario]

Megaman 1-9...

Great. Fucking. Games.

Contra (NES):

Really. Fucking. Difficult.

Silver Surfer (NES):

Incredible. Fucking. Music.

Amagon (NES):

It. Fucking. Sucks.

[Gollgagh]

oh ok so now we're down to reviewing a game in three words

also fucking

[Thalzon]

This Thread

Originally a neat, informative concept to entertain and help people creatively express their opinions. The haiku thing is pretty cool, but poetry isn't my bag so now I'm just reading. Then Gario came and shat all over everything.

6/10

[FR]

(Perfect end to a meh thread)

[Brushfire]

Threads aren't killed until I pop in for the last post FR.

That being said, nobody liked my Young MC joke on DDR.

>__<

Except Zipp, he can be a guest on the Podcast.

[Ferret]

Yeah well when you get people all trying to do their own thing or just be retarded about following the established guidelines that the thread originator hopes they'll use, then yes, things turn to shit faster than Ted Williams' bid for immortality.

[Zipp]

What can I say? There's some great posts in here and some not-so-great posts. It's the way of the internet. If people keep going, I'll keep reading. If not, hey, I've no regrets!

[Kiyobi]

Tekken 6

Color me very surprised.

This game is actually not clunky and crappy.

Tekken just gained a new fan.

8/10

Threads aren't killed until I pop in for the last post FR.

That being said, nobody liked my Young MC joke on DDR.

>__<

Except Zipp, he can be a guest on the Podcast.

Dude, I liked that one too!

*busts a move*

[debeerguy007]

My Review of Dark Castle in three sentences:

Kill me

Kill me

Somebody fucking kill me.

[Oni-91]

Imperishable Night:

I'm playing on Easy and getting my ass handed to me, yet I'm still having fun. I'd like to think I'd still be playing this until I could do Lunatic without sucking, which seems possible given how I'm enjoying dying so much. Also I would like new retinas, please.