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Zero Punctuation (Hilarious) Game Reviews


sephfire
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Fighting VS Dark:

A bunch of jocks beating up a bunch of emos.

You win the internet.:lmassoff:

Dragon weak to ice isn't surprising, they usually are in most stories and movies that I'm familiar with.

But Poison weak to Psychic? Hmmm.....

That's gonna take a couple of nights to sleep on it.

Even better, WHY do bugs resist fighting?

I don't know about anyone else, but the few times I have punched a bug I definitely won the fight.

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psychic beats poison because shit man how you gonna poison a psychic

expanding on that thought

Ground beats Rock?

Where did that rock come from?

Bug beats Dark?

Lots of bugs come out at night. Ever turn on the lights are 2 in the morning in a place that's usually dark? Guarantee there's gonna be at least one spider sitting on the wall. And most bugs either can see in the dark or they don't use their eyes. Or they don't have any.

Ice beats Dragon?

cold blood

Fighting beats Steel? Have you ever tried to punch something made out of steel?

japanese myth

Even better, WHY do bugs resist fighting?

I don't know about anyone else, but the few times I have punched a bug I definitely won the fight.

I'm seriously willing to bet at least half of the type match ups have something to do with some ancient japanese myth or something. It's possible.
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I have, but its been years. Elaboration?

The most obvious example that comes to mind is when Jessica, being the story's equivalent of a psychic, drinks the Water of Life and is able to change the structure of the poison it contained so as to render it harmless.

Basically, what Damned just said above about psychic energy purifying poison.

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But why is ice strong vs. ground? Why is flying strong vs. fight? Rock strong vs. bug? About half of them make perfect sense and the others are whatever they are for the sake of balance.

Dude, I totally got this. Ice vs. Ground: Frozen Soil is more brittle etc.

Psychic Vs. Dark thing can be explained away by the fact that Dark Types are evil (their type in japanese is aku, which literally means evil) so their minds are basically too evil to comprehend, a psychic void, etc.

They're kind of pussies physically so they do get pushed around by Fighting types, and they piss their pants at the sight of big scary bugs.

Same goes for Psychics who get scared by ghosts, dark types, and bugs.

Fighting in general beats everything that can be considered brittle, from Ice up to Steel (Brick Break, Rock Smash), but has trouble reaching Flying types. Their attacks are also ineffective against poison types since those often have amorphous bodies that can absorb physical punches. The same goes for bugs because catching flies with chopsticks, etc.

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I always thought of Dark types more as "dirty fighters" than genuine evil. Moves like Sucker Punch and Thief and Beat Up. That's why I like the idea of Fighting types beating them because they are straight up more skilled and dirty fighting doesn't phase them.

But hey I guess if the ORIGINAL JAPANESE says they're evil then whatev.

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For some reason, I can not watch any video on the Escapist. Any of them. It's not that they aren't playing, it's that they aren't even loading. Like, as in, there is no place for the video on the page for them to appear. It's like it's been filtered out by adblock or something, except according to adblock, there isn't any video to block. The server itself seems to be not sending anything video-related to my computer at all.

And yes, I checked adblock, it's not listing anything related to videos to block, and I've even tried disabling the entire site just to see if that was the problem. No good, video are still completely non-existent. I've made sure everything is up-to-date, and still nothing.

I can only assume that I have been video-watching banned from the Escapist for some reason, or that Sony network hackers have somehow fucked with the page.

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