First of all, I can't get enough of DKC remixes, so bring them on! This track really does work as a trance number, and I think you've got a pretty solid start on this one. Not sure if it's just youtube's encoding, but it does sound a little muddy overall... maybe too much reverb?
I listened to version 1 as well, and it seems too conservative for OCR, arrangement wise. You'll have to add a significant amount of original stuff in the 2nd edition, and also I'd advocate bringing in more percussion earlier than you do in the first one. 3 and a half minutes seems a little long to wait for the real drum groove to get going! Also little flourishes and fills would be welcome - sweeps, dropouts, instrument change-ups, you know the drill. Keep working at it, you're definitely on to something here. Listen to stuff by Jewbei and bLiNd if you haven't already